where do you start... at the beginning I guess. It all started when I was 4, I can remember trying to tell my mother about it,, She either didn't want to except it or didn't understand,, at first I think it was the second but later it became the first. I endure his abuse for over 7 years, not only was he the abuser but a couple of his army buddies became my abusers too.,, I survived what they did physically, mentally is a different story, yes I learnt to use sex to my advantage, I learnt to closet the feelings and to become someone else during the abuse, I have done some things that I am ashamed of and I have done somethings to survive. What a lot of people don't realize is that it affects us in different ways, some turn to sex and others turn against it,, sex is not important to me now, companionship, friendship , and having someone there is. that may be great for me, but my husband has no understanding of why I have no major interest in sex, I love him and try to show this in many different ways. A few of the other side effects of this abuse are I rarely cry, I don't show my feelings, and I have learnt from childhood to be a loner, so friends are few and far between. I am not looking for pity , just airing some of the feelings that may not have been brought to the foreground, before you judge someone, you need to have walked in there shoes,,
wnme wnme
56-60, F
Aug 31, 2014