I Dont Know What To Do, Advice Anyone Pleasre

My biological father sexually abused my older half sister who is now 21, & is a socio path. He went to prison 10 days after i was born, he was there for 5 years. when he got out he was granted supervised visitations with me & my older sister who is autisitic, his only 2 daughters. well those visitations were supposed to be supervised by his wife, who was lead to believe that the reason he went to prison was one big lie. so she didn't believe he ever abused my sister. well my dad started to sexually abuse me when i was 5 or 6, which didnt stop until i moved from florida to virginia with my mom & her husband, i still never came out about the abuse, so i was still visting with my dad during the summer, & he would abuse me then. when i was 12 i finally came out about the abuse. he never went to prison for anything he did to me. as far as i know who only abused me, & never my autisitic sister. my sister moved up to VA with me and my mom. when she turned 18 which was about 2 years ago, she moved back down to florida with my fathers parents, & she has contact with him. its been 10 years since i've spoken to my father, and im thinking about getting reconnected with him. i miss my family, & i hate that they dont want anything to do with me, because they dont want to believe the truth. its not fair that i lost them because of what he did to me. ive already told my mema & papa (my dads parents) that it was a lie, because i dont want them to ever wonder what they did wrong with him while raising him. they are both great people. & id rather them just believe what they want, than to hurt.
what i want to do is call him, tell him i forgive him & im not trying to ruin his life, i would love for him to get help, i doubt he will. he knows i know what he did to me. i think im going to tell him i want my family back. & id rather pretend that nothing ever happened between the 2 of us, just so i can have them back. i just dont know how to go about doing this. someone please give me advice! anything im desperate.
sabrinababyxox sabrinababyxox
18-21, F
1 Response Jan 20, 2013

Just do it ,I know it will be hard . Tell him you forgive him let him know that it hurt you but you want to move on keep it all short unless you and him want to go deeper . I don't think he set out to hurt you but his selfish needs Over took him and he did not realize what he was doing to you . I know it would have been easer if he came to you but I am sure he has guilt , and may not be able to bring himself to it , hope it works for you .