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A Little About Myself

Since this is my first story, I thought I would tell a little about myself on how I was raised and how I have raised my own children.

I am the oldest of three daughters who were raised by a single mother. We were far from poor, but we also never had the latest and greatest clothes and toys growing up. A lot of times our clothes were through second hand shops and a majority of our toys were donated. Although mom did give us that big surprise toy once in a great while, usually for our birthday or a Christmas gift.

Our home was modest, but it was clean and in good repair. And she always made sure there was food on the table for us. We may not have had all the amenities as a lot of the other children, but mom took good care of us, we were happy, and most importantly, we knew we were always loved.

As I'm sure you can already guess since I am posting in this group, but we were also spanked. When she felt we needed it, mom absolutely had no issues giving us a sound, bare bottom spanking. Many now would feel she spanked a lot, or too much. However, to us, that is just how it was. Everyone spanked in our neighborhood, it was used for most misbehavior, and my mom was no different. There was no "spanking as a last resort." If you misbehaved, you got a spanking.

And mom's spankings were never the "one swat per age on a clothed bottom." Sure, she gave us swats, and a lot of times it stopped our behavior. But that was never a 'spanking'. If you got spanked, it was what is called now an 'old fashioned' spanking, which was given over her knee on our bare bottoms. And she spanked us long and hard enough where we didn't want to sit anytime soon if we had the choice.

When we were little, she used her hand. But as we got older she started using a wooden spoon and eventually switched to a hairbrush. But however sound her spankings were (and they were very sound), she always made it crystal clear why we earned a spanking and she never gave me a spanking I didn't earn. We also never had any doubt how much she loved us when giving us a spanking, or in general.

As a mom, I have raised my own very similarly as mom raised us. We have one son 20 and three girls. 12, 21 and 25. Mine have lived a little more comfortably than we did, they are not spoiled, but they have had their share of nicer amenities than we did growing up. However, I have tried to follow in my mother's footsteps in teaching the same values we learned growing up, and I have also done that by spanking when I've felt it to be necessary. Fortunately it is only my youngest that is spanked anymore.

I know you will see a lot of times moms now indicating they do spank as well, but it isn't as sound, or 'bad', as when they grew up. However, as I said above, I always felt love and caring from my mom when she spanked me, no matter how sound they were. And because they were sound, they really sent the desired message. For that reason, I will admit I have spanked mine very similarly as mom did so with us, no less sound, and have tried to show them the same love and care as mom did so with us. And I think I have done so, as I have always been very close with my children.


Sarah

Sarah1966 Sarah1966 46-50, F 26 Responses Dec 16, 2012

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Thanks for sharing Sarah. We definitely have something in common. I'm a few years oolder than you (55) but I was also raised quite strictly. I hope my post can revive the stimulating discussion that your story engendered.

Nice story. How often did you receive a spanking? Did you ever feel like your mother enjoyed the spanking?

I agree. What my patents did for me in soanking, made me a better person. Knowing consequences makes it easier to do the right things in life. I do as my parents did and only with permission.

I think you have done the right thing.

Sarah
I think you have done exactly the right thing, as your mother did before you.

I really enjoyed reading about your experience. I was raised similarly. My mom didn't hesitate to use the hairbrush on our bare bottoms, but there was never any doubt about how much she loved us. Good for you, raising your own children the same way!

You sound like a wonderful Mom, the world needs more like you! We raised our children much the same way, I have always felt that a spanking is a act of love and caring, and that same attitude shows in your story. I remember when my Mom would spank me I would be kicking and bawling my head off thinking it would never end. But finally when it was over, I would still be crying and holding my bare bottom doing the spanking dance, and telling Mom, that it really hurts, she would say "it is supposed to hurt, it doesn't do you any good if it doesn't hurt," then she would do like you do and take me in her arms and comfort me. She was a wonderful teacher, I raised my kids much the same way. Love your stories!

Hi Sarah1966...What you say is perfectly true....I was brought up in the UK as a youngster before and during world war 2 and I recall the old adage..." spare the rod and spoil the child"...and this was the "rule" in those far off distant years and it certainly rings true!...We were a much better society than it is today for the way we were brought up! Also there was not the amount of "modesty" as there is in today's generation. Boys and girls were not differentiated against and would all be soundly spanked on their bare bottoms... in front of each other...even in schools...but mostly it was with the love thru' their parents that the punishment was meted. Unfortunately there were also many instances where abuse did take place and that was mostly in institutions such as workhouses and convents and boarding schools and sadly it goes on in this present day! Trevor in the UK.

I have learned to behave that way and will do the same with my children ... if i ever am lucky enough to hav any

A firm hand is a sign of love.. - well done.

Sarah how old were you spanked till? How old were your kids spanked till?

I received my last spanking at 15, although it was just because I didn't need one past then, not because my mom felt I was too old. Both of my sisters were spanked until their late teens.

As with mine, I've also spanked mine until their late teens.


Sarah

Hi, could you add me please?

Did your children cried during a spanking?

Oh yes, all the time. And they have always cried hard. But then I feel that is just a normal response to a proper spanking being administered.


Sarah

Crying is a normal reaction both to the pain of a spanking and the emotional impact of it on the child. Some children don't cry but for those who do I think it can help them deal with the spanking better than trying to tough it out.

Do you use nappied decipline?

No.

Your mom and my mom were very similar - kind and loving. But when necessary, she never hesitated to take the hairbrush and give me a good old fashion spanking on my bare hiney. I hated the hairbrush but I alway knew that she loved me and did what she thought was best for me. Thanks mom!

My mom spanked. She sounds a lot like yours. I love her dearly; she was loving & warm and sweet, with many hugs and cuddles, but she did not take any guff from her kids, and we did not give her much disrespect to worry about. We learned early to obey authority. We were very well behaved in school and in church.
My father was abusive. He just did not like people. He especially hated kids. I think he was depressed because my mom left him for being a useless loser, and he took out his wrath on his kids during his custody battles. My father did not "spank" in any true sense of the word (unless you call a belt to the stomach and legs and face while cussing the kid out a "spanking"). Child Protective Services stepped in and put us with our mom permanently. She still believed in spanking, but she did it the right way. And she did it rarely, only when it was truly deserved.
I know the difference between them was that what I got from my mom was pure love, even in discipline. What I got from my dad was resentment and hate, and that was regardless of my behavior. Life with him was toxic and unhealthy.
I try to correct misperceptions from people who equate spanking with abuse. They usually come from cold homes & backgrounds like my dad's when they do this.

Toddges,

I am truly sorry to hear what you had gone through your father, but your experiences also gave you perspective from both sides of the coin of what truly is abuse and that spanking can certainly be given out of love. Spanking is not automatically abuse and hitting like many believe it is.

Thank you for your post.


Sarah

Toddges, that sounds like you had an lousy excuse for a father. Too many children get beaten by their parents, if you can really call them parents, because they are either drunkards, druggies, or just never wanted children in the first place. It probably would have been better if he had just been the sort who took off, instead of sticking around.

I think the best part of your story is the love and respect for your mom really shines through. And I think that's important. Parents should never be feared. Your mom sounds like mine. And i love her to death. Anyway...i just joined to tell you that.
- Kelly

Thank you for your message, Kelly, you are certainly correct in that we (my sisters and I) have always had a lot of love and respect for our mom. Yes, she didn't hesitate to spank us (and soundly) if she felt it was needed, but she also always took the time to listen to us, give hugs and tell us how much she loved us. She respected and loved us a great deal, as well.

I am so glad to hear that you have had a mother who has done the same with you, and just as importantly, you have realized it. And, I am sure you have, but I hope you have told your mother you appreciate the love and discipline she has given you, and how you feel about her, as well.

Your mother already knows, however, speaking as a mom, it still feels nice when my own children tell me they love me and makes me proud when they have told me they appreciate the discipline I have given them.


Sarah

Thank you for sharing your story. You and I were brought up, and brought our own children up, very similarly. My own boys have felt the sting of the wooden spoon on their bare little upturned bottoms when they've earned it.

Joe

im not so sure I think spanking is a very good punishment but my mom didnt beat the **** out of me like im hearing on here. why is it that everytime you fuckup you need to be hit till your crying. adults dont usually do this to each other so why is it done to kids. we are taught not to hit others and fight but yet our own parents set a fine example by not only hitting us but pulling down our panties and sometimes in front of others. so the lesson we learn is if a child does something bad its ok to rip down their panties and beat their butt black and blue. if they cant sit diwn without hurting you have gone too far and are abusing your kids. maybe you just want revenge
cause your parents did it to you. the world has changed this a barbaric practice and needs to stop. you are the adult here so why do you like to hit your kids? having to do chores or not being able to go out or losing an allowance are punishments that are much worse and effective. you want your kid to act like an adult why dont you treat them like an adult?

Thank you for sharing your story, Sarah. You sound like a loving mom who only spanked when you needed to. Not too hard or soft, but just right . You did the same with your kids and still do with your youngest girl. Good work in raising your kids to grow up happy, healthy and well mannered.

I am with you. When i grow up my siblings and i always know that if we misbehave we get a spanking and also the most other childs we know and like your mum our parents know what a real spanking is. It dosent harm us it was a normal part of our upbringing and it really teach us right from wrong and respect.
We dont have Handys or PCs or facebook. If we want meet a firend we simply walk over. If we want to know how late it was we look at the Churchtower if we play outside what also was the norm. Whenever someone ask me i say i had a happy childhood.

Very similar to my own experiences, on both ends. I got my tail whupped growing up, and my daughters have all had their backside similarly set on fire.

"Sound spanking" is a very good description. It very much reminds me of my upbringing. The main implement used on me was the hairbrush, and my mum used it very effectively.

your mum sounds just like mine i got spanked then the paddle then the strap and at 15 to 16 i got the cane

So am I reading it right you still spank the 25 yo.? If so I assume she must still be living in your house your rules.

I did indicate in my story that it is only my youngest that is still spanked. I apologize if that was not clear. Last line of the second paragraph from the end:

"Fortunately it is only my youngest that is spanked anymore."

My oldest is actually married and has a baby of her own. I have not spanked her for quite a few years now, not since she was 17.

When I was spanked it was always knickers down otk....

the way you talk about your mom reminds me lots and lots of my mom.