Hey, wait a minute...
A few weeks ago, I was at a get together with some old friends and my younger sister. We were remembering stories of "the good old days" and some bad days and of course came up on the subject of getting into trouble at school and at home.
My sister teased me about how dumb I was to argue with my mother because it only made things worse for me. I countered that at least I wasn't getting bare bottom spankings in my late teens for things that our mother had specifcally told us not to do.
I recalled one occasion when I was home from college during the summer when my mother had told my sister (16 at the time) that she wasn't supposed to go out that evening because my parents had other plans. My sister left the house at 3pm to go swimming with her friends and didn't come back until 7. My mother was furious and sent her up to her room and spanked her.
My sister laughed and said that I was the dummy because if the situation had been reversed, I would have gotten into an arguement with my mother about going swimming and that she would have gotten so mad that she would have belted my butt (longer and worse because I always refused to cooperate) and then grounded me for a few days. I would have ended up with nothing but a welted behind and been stuck inside for days. Instead, she got to go swimming with her friends with a less severe spanking and was then able to go out again later in the week.
She said that she learned from watching me that it was always better never to argue with my mother, almost never to ask before doing something, do whatever it was that she wanted to do, and then always cooperate when it came time for punishment because most of the time, a bare bottom spanking wasn't that bad.
I thought about her comments and realized she was right. Far more than half of my spankings were the result of arguing ("sassing" in my mother's words) with my mother. Almost all of the rest were from fighting with my sister and only a very small number were from actually being punished for doing something wrong.
JennyHill1970 JennyHill1970
46-50, F
5 Responses Aug 17, 2014

I always hated being spanked for "sassing back." I'd be "expressing my opinion" with my Stepmother and suddenly she would decide I was "talking back" or she didn't like my "teen attitude/tone of voice" and next thing I knew...
My skirt or jeans were off and I was fetching a spoon or hairbrush to be spanked bare bottom!

I know the feeling! It really reminds you that you're a child who needs to learn to be polite, not an adult who can hold their own in conversation, even when you're at that stage in late adolescence where you think you're a grown-up.

Your step-mother was right out of The Brothers Grimm fairy tales. I am glad that there was at least the one redeeming feature: generosity. I bet that you are doing a much better job of shedding the step-mom stereotype.

I hope the good ole days still happen now for you.

If your sister thought a bare bottom spanking wasn't that bad, I wonder if the spankings you two got were not nearly hard enough. A spanking is supposed to modify future behavior and certainly should be something that leaves such an impression that future spankings should be regarded by someone who has been spanked before as something to be avoided at all costs. Obviously the ones your mother gave did not fit that criteria.

I mean, why did she bother.

I tried to make that point time and time again, usually while getting blistered by the belt. Corporal punishment typically did not work for me, especially at school. The most swats they could ever give at one time were five and normally were only three. As I mentioned, I almost never got into trouble at home for doing something I wasn't supposed to be doing. It was almost always for arguing or "sassing" my mother. I was and am a head strong person. If I thought something was not logical, I would question it. This infuriated my mother who was brought up never to question an adult, even if the adult was wrong. I wasn't going to change my way of thinking and she wasn't going to beat it out of me.

What would always infuriate me Jenny was my parent's saying "because I said so" when I questioned the reason why I couldn't do a certain something. I thought "who the hell do you think you are?" And often asked that question.

There have been a few occasions as an adult that I remembered something that my mother didn't let me do that at the time I thought was overprotective but now, I think she was probably right. Most of those involved me going somewhere with my friends without adult supervision. However, there were some times when I think she told us "no" just for the sake of saying "no."

I suppose this tought you to control your temper later in life? :)

There have been times in my adult life that I have had to control my temper. I had one boss who was horrible and there were a number of times I had to bite my tongue to keep from telling him off. Eventually I found a much better job and was rid of him. I think my experiences growing up have helped me become a very, very patient person though.

Great story! Do you want to chat privately about "the good old days", Jenny?