Didn't Know I WasThis was with my lastest boyfriend. I met him online back in February/March on a dating site. I've done this before, and never had an issue. This time I just happened to find one of the sh*tty guys. He seemed fine to me. After talking for a while we went out to dinner and hit it off pretty good. After our second date, he asked I wanted to be his girlfriend. We texted a lot, so this didn't seem overly rushed to me. I was cool with it.
I guess I'm too trusting, because I didn't notice that he was being secretive and limiting my involvement in his life. I am an independent person, so having space is necessary for me.
He told me he didn't have a facebook page. This seemed odd to me, because not many 21 year old don't have a facebook. But he said he got sort of left behind after high school because his friends went to college and he didn't, and their posts about their lives stressed him out. I believed him. I have some issues, so I figured maybe he did do. It's not an unreasonable assumption.
I never actually met any of his family. I would go to his house, and his brother or father would be there, but we'd go through the sliding glass door straight into his room. I thought he was doing this because he knew I was nervous about meeting new people.
Anytime I invited him to a family thing, he would tell me he was going to come, but then would bail at the last second. His excuses usually seemed legit, though, so I didn't suspect anything.
We hadn't been dating very long when he tried taking things to the next level. I was still a virgin, so it seemed a little too soon. The first time I went to his house he wanted to have sex. I told him it was too soon, but then we did end up doing some stuff. (My mind said wait, but my body wasn't agreeing, lol). The next day I texted him and admitted that was the most I've ever done with a guy. He didn't believe me at first.
The next time we went to his house, a week later, we did have sex. I don't regret it...I needed to get that first time over with. My family is always around at my house. So anytime he wanted to go to his house, it meant he wanted sex. I only had sex with him 3 times before I started catching on to him.
After only dating for about a month or so, he tried telling me he loved me. I wouldn't let him. I didn't know him long enough to love him and I don't love easily. It makes me feel guilty and that's not fair to me.
My mom was the one that discovered his facebook page. (She's practically a professional facebook creeper). She found a profile with his name, but the picture didn't show him and the info was all private. The picture was of a welder at work...well he just happened to weld at his job. One of his female friends was listed as 'in a relationship' with him. Her page wasn't private at the time. She went to the high school he went to and was around his age.
I tried to convince myself that this wasn't anything. I didn't do a good job. From then on I couldn't feel comfortable in the relationship. It wasn't until a couple weeks later that I confronted him about. I texted him asking who she was. He was like, huh? I don't know what you're talking about. i just said back, "nevermind. Look, I don't really feel the same way about you. I'm sorry but I have to break up with you." He never said anything back and I haven't spoken to him since. (This happened in June.)
He didn't try to explain anything, or ask why I didn't feel the same way. He knew I caught him. Now I know for sure that it was his facebook page, because he has changed the picture to a visible shot of himself. Sometimes I still want to message him just to call him a b*stard. And sometimes, I want to message his girlfriend to **** up their relationship. I just hate confrontation and I don't need to get myself into any drama.
Lucky for me, I didn't feel any heartbreak over this. I honestly barely had feelings for the guy. I was just angry about the fact that he lied to me.
FiveByFive303 22-25, F 2 Responses 1 Jan 12, 2012