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He Died In My Arms

He Died In My Arms.

Posted February 10th, 2012 at 9:12AM
We met a little over a year ago...instant attraction both physical and emotional. Our bond grew with each passing day talking for hours when possible, sharing what was happening in each others, grandkids no topic was left undiscussed. We quickly became best friends, lovers and the heart of the other. We discussed our future and we agreed that while we had no plans on leaving our spouses in the near future...if we where ever found matter how scary starting over was, being without the other was even scarier. I had to go to the hospital and he dropped everything to be by my side, as you see this was more then just a physical affair.
We had been planning our day together for over a week....met, lunch and then what ever the day would bring. I meantioned if he was affriad his wife would find word without hessitation no...if she does " I will have you". That day would be te last day I would ever see we lay in each others arms, a health young man died in mine. The pain and guilt I feel now is almost unbearable. Two families have been shattered. A son and grandchild have lost something that can never be replaced..and I am affriad that they will never know just how much he loved them. They have lost a husband, son, father and grandfather....I have lost my best friend. We both have wholes in our hearts that will never be filled.
He came from a small town, so as you can imagaine the question of why and how he passed...the question of family as to what he was doing with another woman. These people have no regard for him or his family as to the gossip that they spread.
I loved him very much..and I will never have the answers to what happened to him, what caused him to die. I didn't and not have thought about going to the funeral.....but still I mournig must be silent..I can not cry at home I can not cry in frontof people. My heart aches for all that I have caused...the memory of this man to his family, which I begged the cops not to tell them he was with another woman...I didn't want his family to think less of him.
I am not saying I deserve sympathy...his family family does. I ask the question every day what happened...he was healthy and no health issues. I deserve what ever I get...I have distroyed 2 families.
He will never leave my thoughts and will remain in my heart.....I now must find away to moved forward with out answers....

We never intended to hurts those that we loved, I don't think any of us do.....but sometimes fate makes those choices for us.
deleted deleted 26-30 10 Responses Feb 10, 2012

Your Response


great post. I am currently involved with a mm 17 yrs older than me and that is one of my biggest fears. I dont think many people who have not been in our situation would give their sympathy's. My heart goes out to you. Sorry for your loss.

Wow. WOW. The burden you have been left with is enormous. I agree that you should find solice knowing he passed being fully loved. You had a very beautiful thing together that was taken way too soon. It's a shame you are dealing with the small town crap - people are senseless and bored. Your special place in his world didn't change the years of marriage, children & grandchildren he shared with his wife. Both experiences are authentic and you both deserve to fully mourn this very sad event.

I'm so very sorry for your loss. His family's as well. I found great comfort with my own Dad's lover after he passed. It was wonderful for me to know he had this bit of happiness during the last part of his life. Hugs!

I've also read all of you alls responses and let me say condoning this women who cheated on her husband and was seeing somebody else's husband definantly not right in any way.

Please!! I'm a married women and knows what it feels like to be cheated on so shut the hell up. Yes I will judge and say its not right cause it's not, women that go out here in most cases to mess up people's homes are trifling and only think about themselves just to end up in most cases alone and hurt.

Sorry for your loss? He was never hers to began with, me being a married women this story just reminds me how trifling men and women can be. Fact is if he were still alive you all would still be sneaking around with each other.

the cruel heartless troll strikes again - enjopy your self righteousness ALONE

The troll? Self righteousness obviously you have never been married before how would you feel being the other women. Sick *** people on this site really

So sad and touching, that you shared those tender moments and he meant that much to you should be enough to release you from those feelings of guilt. You know that he was special as do his family in their hearts.

The tears are streaming down my cheeks. My heart aches for you.

are you okay ? here it is true story - when my mother died I took over the care of her plants. she could grow anything. there was an african violet that I kept healthy but it would not bloom after 5 years it still would not bloom - In August 2010 I noticed a bud forming - at the same time my Dad started getting sick Dad died September 28 . by that time the plant was in full bloom and stayed that way for a year and a half i havent noticed any more buds on it but it is very healthy. I know that was a message from my Mom that everything was okay and she was taking over . Violets have always been my favourite flower. <br />
open your eyes and your heart - be comforted by the love you shared <br />
there will be love again for you - he will find a way to make that happen <br />
because he loved you ( watch the movie Titanic or PS I love you- cry your heart out and grieve as much as you need to - then you can go on)

Find a place where you can be alone and cry. Let those tears cleanse your soul.<br />

Remember how he felt for you and imagine if he died alone, without this one precious time. You shared a gift and that is how you should think about it. <br />
No regrets, not one, I won't hear of it, girl. Hold that love inyour heart and let it get you through. He would not want you to feel responsible. He loved you.

Sorry for the loss of loved one.

I ache for you. It is so cruel. Mourn - write to me and I will write back . You don`t have to be completely alone.