I Thought She Played For My Team
*NOTE* All names in this post have been changed.
Hi. My name's Lacey, and I'm a lesbian.
I was in a relationship with my best friend, Nathalie. I had completely fallen head-over-heels for her. She had almost become a part of me, my better half. I had trusted her with everything. She was my first girlfriend, and she got my first kiss. It was like magic. My entire body lit up and sizzled with electricity. We've touched each other and played around in the nude a bit, but we've never done the deed, and for that I will be eternally grateful.
Turns out, while I was shamelessly pining over Nathalie for months, she had been with a boy named Nick for over a year. She told me this yesterday, and it sunk in until right now, in the middle of night on the next day. She said everything rather simply.
"I just wanted to practice on you. When I finally got to make out with Nick, I knew everything I needed to know, because I had done it before. I just didn't want to be embarassed. You understand, right?"
I told her I understood, but I didn't. But now all she's worried about is that Nick never finds out. I have the insane desire to just tell him. Let him find out about me in the same way I found out him. About two hours ago, my brain had processed everything Nathalie had said, and I was suddenly filled with an intense hatred for her.
She used me. I had loved her, and she just wanted me to be her play thing, something to keep her from embarassing herself.
But I guess I'm at fault here, too, considering I was so blind. Because out of all the times I told her I loved her...
She never said it back.