From Bad to Worse ...

15 years ago i had an abnormal annual fem exam.  4 years later, at the ripe old age of 20 (when i had my midlife crisis because i was no longer a teenager and had to be responsible - as if i was ever irresponsible! HA!) i had yet another abnormal exam.  this one was so OFF the doctor literally called the surgeon from the exam room while i was still on the table.  3 days later i was in surgery.  evidently i had a small bout of fem cancer.

at the time of surgery i was told it would decrease my odds of carrying a child fullterm by 50% due to the removal of a large portion of my cervix and with each passing year it would become less likely to carry a child fullterm.  this proved to be fairly accurate as i've since had a miscarriage. 

in '04 i took a bad fall resulting in a virtual 'broken' knee.  there were no tendons or ligaments left within the structure nor was there any cartilage left.  what was supposed to be a maximum of 9 mo recovery ended up being a 100% disability.

nearly 3 months after the initial injury i was diagnosed with a neurological disorder brought on by the joint trauma.  it's incurable.  it's excruciating.  it requires me to be medicated on a daily basis.  i endured a total of 42 surgeries in a 7 month period of 2004.  this disorder is not lethal, although 88% of it's victims commit suicide to escape it's jaws of pain.

i have since been advised by the specialist that it would not be of benefit for me to be or become pregnant as i would have to discontinue the medications which in turn could and most likely would cause the symptoms to increase beyond tolerable (as if they aren't already intolerable WITH medication!) 

in summation, pregnancy is possible, however, not only are my odds fairly low of carrying full term but i've been advised not to conceive at all for the sake of my own health.  *sighs*

perhaps for the best though, eh?  the very least it can provide is an end to the genetic cycle in my family which tends to produce monsters.  hehe

AbbyNormal AbbyNormal
31-35, F
5 Responses Jun 29, 2007

Don't be sad with what you don't have. Be happy with what you have. :)

so sorry to hear what happen but keeping a brigt light for u :)

aww ... *blushes* Y'all are the BEST! Thank you, SN, Erica and CG. You all give me the warm fuzzies.

Wow, you seem to have run into quite the bit of bad luck/circumstance. I hope there are some unusually good things happening in your life to make up for it!

I think we need more people like you out in our gene pool but if you can't you can't... I wish you could though!!