Hell On Wheels.

So y'all wanna hear about my road trips, huh?  I have been on a million family road trips, since my family  can't really afford to use any other method of travel.  Plus my dad has always been a big fan of them, since he can control where we go, how we get there, when we stop etc.  My dad's family operates in one way:  What's mine is yours.  Which means, if my dad was planning a trip for us, his brother (and best friend) would decide to make it a joint effort, including his wife and children in on the deal as well.  But no, it wouldn't stop there.  My family will find a way to accomodate anyone, even if it's uncomfortable for everyone.  On one trip in particular we were headed up to New York for my second cousin's baby shower.  Usually, my dad would rent two SUVs and my uncle would drive one and he, the other.  This time, though, they had the bright idea for a fifteen passenger van, since they'd taken one to Cali two years back and it had been sufficient.  Well I thought, okay, a fifteen passenger van will be cool!  More space.  WRONG!  More space to my dad and uncle meant, Let's invite more people!  UGH!  So on the day of the trip I was informed that the passenger list included:  Me, my dad, his gf, her son, my uncle, his wife, her sister and her son, my two cousins, their friend, my aunt, and her bf.  Now, I know that doesn't equal fifteen people, but let me just let you know that fifteen passenger van equals fits ten people and luggage comfortably.  Instead there was thirteen people and EVERYONE'S luggage in this crammed up vehicle.  For eleven hours. 

At first it was all fun and games.  My aunt and her sister and my dad's gf had alcohol and were drinking.  Everyone was laughing, but as the night grew on, we all became tired.  Well my dad was in a certain mood.  He always gets in this, I'm-gonna-keep-everyone-up-when-I'm-driving-on-a-trip mood.  Where he talks nonstop, rolls the windows up and down, blasts air conditioner and music.  Well we were all dosing off pretty good.  Until "No sleep til Brooklyn" starts blaring.  Apparently we were not allowed to sleep until we got to Brookyln.  I don't think anyone really did.  By the next morning we were just all tired, cranky and uncomfortable.  My aunt's bf was complaining and whining and crying like a baby about everything.  But I get a big laugh out of it now. 

Another one of our New York trips was for another second cousin's wedding.  That time we got two SUVs.  We got there late, of course.  Someone was drunk and wrecked into one of our rentals, but only did a little damage, thank God.  After the wedding, most of us shoved up into the undented SUV and drove into the city for some sightseeing.  We spent hours riding around the city, getting lost in Harlem, with my dad sticking out his head when we passed those fancy outdoor eateries and pretending to vomit.  It was a wild time. 

Perhaps my most unpleasant road trip came in the summer of 2007.  I was coming from New York to NC with family.  In a seven passenger SUV, there was me, six kids, and two other adults.  Two of the kids in that car were the absolute worst demon children I've ever known.  So that about sums it up.  We had someone who hadn't taken her anti depressants and was car sick on top, so she was puking in a bag behind my head.  The two adults up front were smokers so they would roll down the windows and smoke, one after the other.  One of the adults is a petite woman who gets cold in 75 degree weather, so even though it was summer, she kept turning off the air conditioner.  Must be nice to have a vent blasting in your face while your majorly overweight kid was half on top of me!  Ugh!  I couldn't put my feet down because there were bags stuffed under my feet.  There really wasn't even room to breathe.  There was two preteens fighting over who's nintendo DS was who's.  That, my friends, was hell on wheels!

urbrandofheroin urbrandofheroin
22-25, F
3 Responses Feb 20, 2009

I think you ought to travel Europe by car and train. It would be great! And thanks for the book idea. I think I just might do that.

"You aint seen nothing yet!"..as the song goes!<br />
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<br />
How about Adelaide to Darwin!<br />
<br />
Drive up via Port Augusta,Coober Pedy(opals),Ayres <br />
<br />
Rock(Uluru) and Alice Springs and not much in between!<br />
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Then put your car on the train for the return <br />
<br />
journey,,,,,,Maybe carry on to Melbourne after you have<br />
<br />
discovered South Australia!

But the story is rather good one! Have you considered to write a book about it? I'm planning to make also a road trip. I never had one. I'll go with my car through all the Europe and back. Alone. I've done every kind of things in my life, but never had a road-trip yet. And I'm already 43. Or do you think, it is a bad idea?