My First Thought

.....upon entering the class was sweet mother of god its hot in here. Warm, humid air pungent, with the distinct aroma of  perspiration, a smelly phantom lingering unseen. Im questioning my decision to try this as I find a place to lay out my mat and towel. *sigh* Right in front of the instructor. I feel like Im in a scene from an 80s teen movie, Ferris Beuller perhaps, based on my decision making process to leave this morning, much like Cameron sitting in his car , anguishing over skipping school . You have to understand IM one of those people that poke fun at Yoga. The name sounds awfully close to yogurt and the poses look silly. If I had my choice Id go take Tai Chi but its hard finding classes with hours to accommodate my schedule so Yoga here I come. Impress me.


I first had to print off the registration and waiver form which took me four tries and a reboot of the printer....which gave me four forms. It had the usual information. Name, address, phone number, next of kin( in case you became hopelessly stuck in a pretzel like position and died for some freakish reason ), health issues.....I very nearly put down 'I dont want to be shaped like Kung Fu Panda' but stuck with my back as a major concern.  So, with mat, towel, water and a change of cloths I rushed out the door to class. There was a certain amount of fear  of being the last ...or late  to class and the subject of some obscure and arcane Yoga hazing ritual if I was.

Its approximately 20 min to the class and I passed the miles dutifully drinking the suggested water and listening to the Satellite radio which started the trip by playing Young Blood and Slow Poison. Between the printer and these songs Im feeling a little uncertain now but Im going for it. Do or die Im not stopping! My body and mind are rebelling. The body is telling me how much it loathes physical exertion, never mind the fact that its part of my job.It reasons that its recreation and that its supposed to be 'fun' . My mind keeps telling me its Saturday and my routine is get up, go to Starbucks and get a venti Vanilla Latte and a bakery treat,. I reassure my worried mind we will. I lied....well....half lied.

So class begins. Its an hour and a half long. No breaks. No talking other than the instructor. There are 26 poses, two repetitions each and two breathing exercises. You may drink water in between poses. You cannot escape. There is a high barbed wire fence patrolled by dogs and  armed gaurds. Ive mentioned how hot it is and I could tolerate that(or so I thought) as Im in it at work all day. My second observation was how quiet it is. Even for early morning it was serene. I really didnt know if there was something I should be doing like stretches or meditation as but I feel I fulfilled the role of newbie quite well.

Once things started it was a blur of pose, rest pose, rest then onto the next. There were others there with creaking, popping bones so I dont feel so bad. Some I did well, others not so much. A few would have ended in certain death for me. I was winded after 45 minutes, my god was that tiring. By the time we went into the floor poses I was ready to tag out and then... my back popped.  It felt both wonderful and painful and I hesitated to move for  concern my upper body had separated from my lower. I dont think Ive ever sweated so much in my life.

Relief came as the class ended and we began the relaxation. The only time you ever feel even somewhat cool is when your prostrate on the floor where the cool air stays. Once we began to cool down the instructor brought  us cool, damp towels scented with lavender. I was tempted to remove all my clothing and drape myself with them it felt sooooooo good. I changed my clothes once class was over, paid for the month and headed  for my latte. I wasnt hungry and my body did complain slightly at the denial of a classic coffee cake slice.

A few observations I had while driving home were a) I dont know hen I sweated that much. Ever! In fact I didnt stop sweating until I had been home for awhile. b) My muscles were tight and tired like I had been doing some serious physical work outs. They quite literally quivered, in a good way, from my first class. c) I felt very energized. Really. Im annoying myself with how peppy I am right now. So. The description promised a workout equivelant to a 90 minute jog and it delivered. I feel a little more loose and my backs feeling better. I apologize to all those who practice yoga, I have been schooled and humbled.

Deanze Deanze 41-45, M 15 Responses Jul 2, 2011

Your Response


Theyre very nice, but I understand that it is possibly unique to where I go.

*faerie goes to Dean's yoga studio and whacks him with lavender-scented towel*

Lavender towels? I suffer intensely for 90 minutes and all I have to look forward to is a 90 min. Euphoriria like I've never felt in my life. I'm not complaining but I would so dig a cool lavender towel.

All I can say is you wont know til you try it. The heat and humidity is daunting but once you get the breathing down you dont notice,

*Faerie takes Quercus hand and leads her to yoga studio... throws away Book of Adjectives*

It's not a scary thing. It is actually an exhilarating experience. Please do not pass up an opportunity to even try. I have been rallying hot yoga in my workplace and with friends, here and in rl... not because I want to have people I know to come join me... but because the experience is deep and intense. And that alone is worth sharing.

And... if you're clumsy... haha... faerie accuses inanimate objects of attacking her. ;p

Okaaayyy... hmmm... how about hot, humid Mexico?

*faerie twirls Taken's bikini*

Don't wanna say I told you so...

But... ;p

You'll probably slip if you have them on with all the sweat dripping on your mat.

But as they say in yoga... you need to be closer to the earth as much as possible. *hides Dean's jester's shoes*

shame I cant keep the shoes

Lol! I did try a head bandana before... damn hair and sweat... those headbands don't work for me... they slide down my hair...

Faerie tears... image... Dean in his jester hat... doing yoga....

I think theyd wonder about a jester hat in yoga

Huh? *wonders where the jester hat went*... must be the shakti...

But I'm glad you saw the flashing neon sign the universe was showing you...

I take what the world and the omens point to.

How about a distracting bouncing faerie? *faerie bounces up and down*...

*shushes the mumbling*... as long as you're doing what you want. Doesn't matter who's right or wrong. *faerie marks scoreboard*

Still keep looking for tai-chi, your foremost goal, ok? *tight squishy hugs*

Hugs faerie tight. *mumbles* You were right I was wrong.

DT-I really had those thoughts going through my head and it took every ounce of will power to not write them down. I really am a great big chicken and it takes a lot to get me to commit to something. I hated the gum because i went when I wanted and did what I wanted. This has set classes and structure so unless theres a distracting bunny hopping through class Ill be alright.

Aaaahhhh!!! *faerie shrieks running to Dean*... what did I tell you??!!! Isn't it the most amazing thing ever??!!! I am just sooooo darn proud of you right now... *faerie climbs all over Dean and squishes him tight*...

One month, huh? *faerie jumps up and down*... this is soooo friggin exciting!!! But Lol... it had to be Bikram... this is like bootcamp yoga... wish you could find Moksha or Hot Hatha... there's a balance here with mind and body. Bikram is all about physical... the mental part comes telling yourself, "breathe, breathe, breathe". Still... it's yoga... aaaahhhhh...!!!

And faerie accepts your apology... now you know what I go through e-v-e-r-y-d-a-y! *squishes you tighter* ;p

And... next time you're battling yourself in your car... just... breathe... deep inhale... deeper exhale...