I didnt want to tell you, or let you read it, because i was so scared. So scared of losing you. you were so special to me, the most amazing person i had ever met. I was in love with you. You told me clearly, "No matter where i am, im always with you. No matter what-if im in california, or at my house, ill always be with you. Right here." you touched my heart. Literally, and figuratively.
I wonder if you still remember the look of love in my eyes when you told me that. You said, always and forever you'd be in my heart. I thought it was the sweetest thing anyone had said to me...
I didnt realise it was a curse.
Now, i wish you werent. I wish i could escape the ghost of you. There isnt an hour that goes by where you dont cross my mind. You are in my heart-****, you are my heart.
I wish you werent. Because you hurt me, broke me. In the worst way. You made me be strong-You made me do the dirty work. And then you had the nerve to rub it in my face, you could see the look of pain in my eyes. You heard that crack in my voice when i asked if you still loved me...
You lied to me. Your a ******* liar!!!!!!!! You got a new girlfriend 2 days after you told me that!!!!!!!
My biggest fear was loosing you-and i lost you.
does that make me fearless, or strong?
i love you so much you dont even ******* care. **** you.
despite all of your flaws-you were perfect in my eyes. I realise now how flawed you were. You were so cocky. Why were you so cocky? Acted like you were the 'man' and loved your b!tches...Yet you couldnt even get your d!ck up! haha you should seriously see a doctor for that...
Maybe i really havent moved on. But i did let you go. You made me be strong. I hate you for that.