My Beloved

" No matter where I go, no matter where I will be, no matter who I am with... you are always in my mind"

I dont' know why you have such great impact in my life..but you do.

I did tried many times to control my feelings and my thoughts but I have repeatedly failed.  I dont' know what else I can do to make me put away 'what was'.  I still love you very much and I believed you do to..

I have asked once if you would want to look for another that is nearer, ...that is convenient....that is available to you rather than still having me as your babe that is so far away and couldn't be there as much as you want me to be... You answered 'No, I am not interested'..  

Obviously I am happy to hear you aint interested in other gurls....but I kept asking myself will you be happier without me?  Will you be less stressful if I dont exist anymore?  Am I a burden to you?  Are you still as happy to see me?  Is the anticipation of seeing me still there?...and so many questions that is in my head now.....

I dont' know why am I feeling so insecure lately.....  I am trying so hard to make myself understand that there is actually nothing much I can do if a man wants to leave....neither can I stop a man from loving me...

What will tomorrow brings.... why am I so worried since last nite?