I Will Never Get Over This

I have been into diapers since I was nine years old. Before that I had no interest to wear and just thought it was so uncomfortable to stay in messy and wet diapers because that was why I quit wearing them when I was three because they got uncomfortable. But according to my mother I quit because I figured out I wasn't a baby anymore after I saw my brother's messy diaper for the first time. It was two weeks after he was born. Then after that I was in pull ups or plastic pants and underwear and had accidents until I was five.

For a while I just thought I was weird because I liked diapers and wished I could wear them and I thought I would get over it someday. Then I thought I was over it but it always came back and I was lurking in the AB/DL community in my teen years before I was wearing so it was obvious i was into it.

Now I wear diapers as an adult (I started at 17) and it has come and went over the years and then the urges for me to wear one would come back. Then after I had my baby, I lost interest in wearing them so I didn't lurk in the AB/DL community much and I thought I was over them for good but when my son was eight months, the urges came back and I started to think about going back to wearing them again, maybe go 24/7. I had thought about getting rid of all my diapers and sell them to other adult babies in the area but I kept onto them thinking I may need them in the future and I do have a hard time letting stuff go I have. But good thing I did hang on to them because I didn't have to spend any money on diapers again when I started up again. My husband told me he knew it would come back. When I got my first period again, the diaper urges came back. I don't know if it was just a coincidence now because I wore during my pregnancy too off and on but not much and I also wore every night for convenience and it helped me sleep better. I also wore when I be out and I didn't want to rush for the bathroom like every 15 or 20 minutes so I wore one to the video game convention and used it there all day and those Walgreen diapers held up a lot. I wore two thinking they wouldn't be as good but they are actually great diapers.

Then when my husband decided to force me to wear diapers, I didn't even feel like wearing them but I loved it when he put them on me before work and then he punished me one day by making me have sex for not wearing a diaper and I was to wear them all the time. I have been in them ever since. He told me I am in them for the rest of my life and it's my punishment and I am way too obsessed about money and finances.

I used to think I would quit wearing them when I meet a guy but I realized i didn't want to quit when the time came so I seeked out other AB/DLs because it was easier than having to face the embarrassment of telling and seeing how they will take it. Then I thought I would just quit when I have kids, wear them for a while and then quit but then I realized I still wanted to wear them after I have my baby and I can still wear them when he is little and then quit when he is older and not wear until he is out of the house. Now i am realizing no way do I want to give this up, not even for ten years or twenty years. I like them too much.

I will always like diapers and the interest will come and go and I will get bored with wearing them and then enjoy them again. They will be a pain in the *** at times because of itching skin and rashes and sometimes the discomfort of a wet diaper. So I will be wearing them for the rest of my life and if my husband never changes his mind about keeping me in them forever.

girlwithanxiety girlwithanxiety
26-30, F
5 Responses May 10, 2012

Thanks for sharing that, I to am pretty much in the same situation as you, I have always enjoyed pee games (waaay back before the days of the net) and it was always a part of me. Once I discovered diapers there really was no going back. I have been wearing off and on for the past 6 years or so but in the last year I have realized that they are actually part of who I now am and at this point I couldn't quit wearing them if I tried. I was lucky enough to meet someone who also enjoys diapers and completely accepts me for who I am and my psychological need to wear them. I have been wearing them 24/7 for the past few months and I enjoy every minute of it.My partner and I have a long term goal of me becoming incontinent through continual wearing and I love her to bits for helping me on this path, I say helping me as she insists that I wear them 24/7. This reeeeally helps me a lot as I think every diaper wearer can relate to having binge/purge cycles where we feel guilty for some reason and just want to be rid of them and be "normal" . So being forced to wear even when I don't feel like it for a few days really helps me overcome these thoughts. But to be honest the more I wear the less I have these purge cycles or desires to want to be "normal". I realize that they make me feel good and that I hurt no one wearing them so what the hell does it have to do with anyone else if I wear or not ?.

To all those loving diapers and wanting to pursue wearing them....JUST DO IT !
Its your life and honestly (unless you are trying to be caught) no one knows or even cares what you are wearing for underwear.

I have never been happier than I am now with being encouraged to wear 24/7 and I look forward to the day that I will eventually be as physically dependent on my diapers as I am psychologically.

Stay strong and stay diapered people.

Great that you can share this with him. What do you wear with them?

My clothes, my pajamas. Plastic pants.

what about when you're out?

Clothes, disposables. Sometimes i go out in cloth if I am not gone that long.

what sort of clothes do you wear, to hide it?

My normal clothes. I don't care for the bulk. I will also wear a bathing suit under my clothes to keep them from showing if my outfit can't hide it. I wear jeans or loose pants or long shirts that go down to my butt.

not skirts? people say they hide it well

I mostly wear pants.

fair enough! Do you think people ever notice what you're wearing?

Maybe, maybe not. If I can't tell, I doubt others can too. I don't think about it.

that's good. I expect they're not looking anyway. Good that you live for yourself though!

7 More Responses

Good for you that you've stayed true to wearing and using diapers. It's not such a big deal, when you really get down to it. Better to use them, and enjoy being in them, than to fret over it and feel all embarassed. Your husband sounds like a winner for having the insight to keep you in them, too.

Good for you guys that you have found each other!

I'll send you a private message about this one!

You are so fortunate to have a spouse that wants you to wear. My spouse vigerously aposes me wearing and I have to do so in private. That means I can only do it when I go out alone and have to hide my diapers and cleaning up is very difficult. It must be fun to have a baby in diapers while you are in them too. You can then wet together