Will Never Be With Anyone!! Ever!!

all throughy life i have always been a loner, have low self esteem and zero confidence!! i always lived in hope, that one day i will raise my self esteem, get myself some confidence, and go out and get myself a girlfriend, settle down, get married and all that follows!! but who was i kidding, i 29 now, and i no further forward, still no sef esteem and zero confidence!!and no luck with the women!! mostly down to my lack of confidence!! now over the years, i have come to accept myself for being a loner and all, but the thing that upsets me, is that i keep hoping that one day i might get lucky, but in my mind, i just know it will never happen, and i need closure on this part of my life, if i want myself to be happy, then i need to try forget about getting a girlfriend "ever"!! im sick of myself trying to pretend that all that is ahead of me in the future!!! its not just that i have low self esteem and zero confidence that makes me feel this way, but also the fact im a loner, and even when women try to get close to me, i tend to push them away, cos i wouldnt put any woman through going out with a sad guy like me!! i just wouldnt be fare on the woman!! my romantic life is over before it even began, it sounds pretty sad , but at least i will be happier once i find a way to close this chapter of my life!!!

cowshed123 cowshed123
36-40, M
6 Responses Dec 7, 2009

thanks for the support guys!! it means a lot to me, to have people that CARE about me in this way!! i hope things get better, not just for me, but for everyone!!

I hope things get better for you, man.<br />
I really do.<br />
<br />
Good luck, bro.

thanks "panglowin"!! in some ways i think that right in the back of my mind i kinda dont give up on myself, and this is why i cant get that closure on this part of my life that i talk about!!!

there is always hope. never give up on the world, never give up on others, and, most importantly, never give up on yourself.

thanks for commenting guys!! *zombiekitty* i like that idea!! we need to get some practise in first though!! lol i need to get my singing voice together, you know, cos i wouldnt want to be sounding like a dog with a pipe stuck up its @$$!! then the women will be falling at my feet lol!! and you might get some hunky guys too!! lol!! and *newday* thank you hunny!! i always try to give myself as much credit as i can, but i just always end up feeling down, cos i just cant see things changing for me!!

NO....you are such an awesome guy. You are so much better than you give yourself credit for, I feel much the same as you do and I am older than you so I feel like somehow I have messed up and I am worthless, that could be the only answer in my world. However having a friendship with you has strengthened me to keep going, to know that there are actually great guys out there and not just the mean ones that I meet, but ones like you.<br />
Hugs xxxx