Happier Than My Momma

My mom totally missed out on the past 17 years of my life (I'm 23) and practically my little sister's whole life (she's 17), working at a job she hated.  She came home miserable every single day, with no energy to do anything but sit in front of the TV and b*tch about the house being a mess.  Her job got "outsourced" (read: she was laid off) last year and now she does exactly what she did at work all day - stare at the computer screen - and exactly what she did at night - stare at the TV screen, only now she's at home so she bosses my sister around like a maid and b*tches all the time about the mess, but never does anything about it. 

I'm going to school to be an actress and she hates that because she thinks I will never make any money, but I don't care.  When I decided what I wanted to do with my life and she told me she wouldn't pay for me to go to school for it unless I chose to pick a realistic career, I told her that I didn't care if I had to beg and steal to pay for my education but I would not end up like her - bitter and angry with no life and no dreams because she gave them up to chase a paycheck.  She didn't like that much, but it was the most honest I ever was with her.  And I mean it.  I have marketable skills so that I will have a day job to pay the bills, but someday I will work full-time as an actress and I will never look back.
Chanteuse1984 Chanteuse1984
26-30, F
9 Responses Jun 6, 2007

You're inspiring. (: Your situation sounds a lot like mine...though music is my focus. My parents think it would be a ''waste of my brains" to try for such an 'unrealistic' career, but I can just tell that I'd never be truly happy doing anything else in its place. I want to be happy, not a blob in a cubicle. Society irritates me. If you want to be happy, then TRY. Complaining gets you nowhere. Ugh. Okay, rant over. (: I wish you the best of luck!

write a song called "Not a Blob in a Cubicle"

I bet with the right riff, "Not A Blob In A Cubicle" would be a big hit.

Dance was my focus. I did it as a hobby, but I often wish I had pursued it as a career because I would have probably discovered cool things like music therapy and be doing the choreography for big wigs like Paula Abdul does/did.

Follow your star - very good luck and be happy!<br />
Sorry you have such a mother - she should not take out her misery on you and spread it around, but she will never change. She sounds like my mother.

It's awesome that you found your passion and are completely devoted to it. This passion for what you do will get you far in life and it will be a driving force through all the struggles to get there. When the passion and determination is there, you have the power to make a so-called 'unrealistic' career reality. Just wanted to say this entry was inspiring to me (my passion lies in music, another one of those 'unrealistic' careers) and keep going on the path you're on. :)

Actually, Curious, it's more like a 2% success rate. :)<br />
<br />
And it's not just to spite my mother. I am pursuing it because it is my heart's greatest desire and it is where my greatest talents lie. I have back-up plans and "grocery bill" jobs for if and when it doesn't work out, but I WILL pursue my dream. I am in my final year of a very strong BFA Musical Theatre program and once I graduate, I intend to pursue my dream before giving up on it.

I like your attitude. I have three daughters, and I have encouraged all of them to pursue their dreams, be wise to have back up plans, and to look at the good, the bad, and the ugly of their dreams through realistic eyes. My mother had a job she loved and it paid her well. As a child she kept us busy in lots of extra curricular activities. However, we were hardly ever home, and she squelched all of my dreams and beat up on my self esteem, and sorry to say, she still does. It took a long time for me to discover the obstacles to my own success had to do with my response to my mother. For once I would like to hear her say she is proud of me without a "but" following her praise. It seems nothing I ever did was good enough or the right thing as far as she is concerned. I do love my mom and she has been supportive in many other ways. I have become the buffer and cheering squad for my daughters in the wake of her "you should/should nots" so she cannot tear them down the way she, possibly unknowingly, did to me. It is too late for me to recreate the crushed dreams of my youth because they required my youth. However, I secretly applaud myself because I realize I did live my greatest dream which was to be at home with my children and my children are pursuing their dreams in full force. I was not a career driven woman, and I worked in education because we needed the money, and I needed to be with my children. Now my children are grown and I am discovering a new dream, but lol it still involves helping, healing, educating, coaching, and motivating others while staying at home.

Maybe you're thinking too much about who is saying this to you, and who is giving you advice on what to do, instead of what is actually being said. <br />
<br />
Finding a good job is difficult period.<br />
You should know that becoming an actress isn't easy.<br />
Go for it, but when you do, be prepared to become as famous as hollywood stars. Because if you can't get into hollywood, there's a chance that there is not much business going on anywhere else.<br />
<br />
Just get a good education and get acting classes besides it maybe, just as a hobby and an aditional future you could choose for in case you get an opportunity. But it's true, you shouldn't rely on that opportunity. <br />
Because imagine you got a 20% succes rate of becoming a succesfull actress, you will probably have a better succes rate that average actors but there's stil a 4 times bigger chance that you won't find a future in acting.<br />
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Don't continue this acting just to refuse to your mum.

I so know what it`s like to have a parent who hates their job, and b*tches about it non<x>stop. I realize they have to pay the bills, but complaining to the kids about how hard they work for so little does not instill any confidence in the idea of `work`. The same job-b*tching parent had the nerve to suggest that I work with her, in the filing room. Just what I need- a mindless soul-squishing job that boxes me in and turns me into the one thing I never wanted to be. Her. No thanks, lady...

Good on ya!!!

Go for it - what is that book "Do What You Love And The Money Will Come"? I admire you for going for the brass ring and being strong enough to stick to your guns! I'm sorry for your Mom who must have gone for the paycheck to raise you and your sister? Maybe I'm wrong about this.

I am both impressed and inspired by your story. You've clearly got both inner strength, and insight into how important it is to create a life that you're happy with. It's very hard to buy any sort of lasting happiness with money, and if our dearest hopes, dreams and desires are not worth striving for, what are we? I wish you the very best of luck!