Holiday Blahs

Here we go again, Three years now and still such a threshold to cross. I have to work so hard to keep myself busy so the darkness of grief doesn't gain on me, if I let my guard down I will be overtaken and the internal light, that light that is the core of who I am, will be snuffed out, and darkness will slither in and I will be lost for a spell. I fight to keep my perspective, losing a loved one is like losing a limb, and you still feel it, as a phantom. Pity party is not my style, so I reach into my treasure chest of things to be thankful for, I pull out my ole faithful, it has gotten my through many bouts of the blues. I loved and was loved, I shared years with my friend, my husband, my love. How blessed I have been to have found such love to begin with. Some never even get close to such happiness. So Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, the holiday... I live thanksgiving on a yearly, monthly, weekly, daily basis just to make it through, and tonight I'm thankful for all in my life, present and past.   "Happy Thanksgivings"  to all my EP family

grams grams
56-60, F
4 Responses Nov 26, 2008

Thanks frito, I have learned by being here on EP, that letting your feelings go helps so much in the process of healing, and sometimes it comes with the blessings of helping others.

I'm finding this post so much later. This is a beautiful, loving story.


Your a strong and beautiful woman.