Longing For Innocence

i am 20 now, i recently turned 20. even through my late teen years i wished to be younger, and unlike a lot of people i never wanted to grow up fast. even when i was little i hoped it would last forever, and being grown up seemed so far away. i did not know much about the hate and cruelty in the world at that age, i know too much now. crude jokes that went way over my head then if i happened to overhear them, now i get them, but they still aren't funny to me. i am still optimistic, but i can't say im innocent anymore.

i wish i could unlearn a lot of the bad things, or at least not have to worry about them. i wish i could be as carefree and innocent as i was. when i was little i enjoyed things like playing pretend, and the most i had to worry about was getting my homework done, or cleaning my room. those were some of the happiest times, i get a warm feeling whenever i think of those times. i even miss my early teen years, i mean..not too long ago i was a teen anyways! how can i be nostalgic for something that i had only months ago? and yet i am, and the funny thing is i don't feel any different. im an adult now, but i don't feel like an adult at all! well maybe a bit, but not much.

now im not saying i don't like being an adult at all, after all being an adult has plenty of benefits. i can do things now i never could before, i have more freedom. there are a lot of good things about being an adult, but i am still a kid at heart and always will be. i still watch those kids shows on occasion when i feel nostalgic.

i was thinking of writing about my childhood. i don't remember many details but i think i might enjoy writing something based on it loosely just to get the feel of the nostalgia in writing. lol i may not though, i could never finish any of m writing ideas --__-- oh well.
SummerDragonfly SummerDragonfly
18-21, F
Jan 8, 2012