When I Thought I Found The One

I wish I didn't care about him so much. I know now that he isn't right for me but it doesn't really change how I feel. I feel like I should be able to convince him to feel differently, for him to see me how I see him. Desperate huh? But everytime I think of him, which is every time I have a free moment, all I can remember are the happy times. The memories of us making out, or him saying the most heart-warming things to me. Or the times when I really needed him there and he just sat with me in silence. He helped me battle this so much. He made me think I was doing it all myself though. If only he really could love me. If only we could work. Tragically I still have hope. I still hope that he will see me differently one day. I feel like I will be waiting for him forever.

I love you. I feel like I did since I first met you and with this distance between us I feel it just the same. You are perfect for me. You make me feel stronger. You share the nothingness I can have and make me feel like it's all OK. You make me think that I really can just pick myself up and carry on. With you I think I could.

Every email is a stab at how perfect you are for me. It makes me cry, seriously, nearly every one. It makes me feel as if I wish I could be more like you. You are amazing. You are so caring. And I couldn't ask for a better friend. It's just that I still want something more.

Sleep tight. I miss you.
2k12 2k12
Nov 28, 2012