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It's Not About Being In just Any Relationship... But the right 1
Feb 17th, 2009
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ee there was this girl who I had such a connection with that I just couldn't understand how this was even possible... I mean we really do think alike in every-way!In fact after knowing her for only a month and a half... I asked her this very question... "Out of everybody whom you have known in your whole entire life, all of your sorority sisters in college , your mother , father , relatives, heck even the ex boyfriend who dated you for 2years and got on his knees to propose to you in which you turn him down... Who knows you better than anybody?"
And she said to me, "You do, you know me better than anybody" Only problem is I had completely no Idea that she was in love with my older brother ... My older brother however turned her down although I'm not sure if it was because me or that he really didn't like her.
Kinda sucks but ever since that happened we never talked to each other again, and she lives 4hours away now, So I don't bother.
A lot of my relationship I somehow find myself to end up with a girl who really does accept me for who I am and cares and have strong feelings about me... the only thing that's missing from the girl is that she isn't very understanding... and so there she is dragging me to help her care about the dumbest things in life. I just feel such a sense of emptiness in the relationship that I end up saying to myself "WHY oh Why did I ever get into this relationship in the 1st place?" I would then turn my back and walk away, because I couldn't put up with it anymore... I just felt that the relationship wasn't fair... she was able to care so much about me and there I am not being able to express back the feelings and love to her... and that right there just made me feel terrible in the inside.
This happened exactly the same way to three different girls in whom I have dated in my past relationship.
I've been single for more than 2years now and I can't even believe that it has been this long!... I didn't want to make the same mistake that I have been doing in my past relationship... I guess I though as long as I don't date anybody then I won't be able to break anybody's heart by turning my back and walking away.
The girl that I met that I had such a connection with who was in love with my older brother, I met her 2years ago... after her, that's when I became spiritual and began my journey to find myself.
I'm glad for everything that happened now, because I was able to learn so much about myself that I never knew... What I really do look for in a girl is for her to be able to understand as much as I do and so therefore she has to have a great deal of respect and undertstanding about herself then I would have no reason to leave because she's pratically my equal in everything.
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  | Posted Feb 17th, 2009 at 4:53PM Good luck in your search for a girl thats right for you :-)   |
 | Posted Apr 18th, 2009 at 10:22PM I have a wonderful connection like that with the guy that I am with now. We have literally everything in common, and we are very understanding and compassionate towards one another. I am sorry that it couldn't have happened for the two of you, but hopefully you will find that connection once again. Good luck, sweetie |
 | Posted Apr 25th, 2009 at 7:32PM I can relate to a goof portion of that experience. Thanks for sharing it. Connection truly is important. |
 | Posted Jul 4th, 2009 at 9:56AM I'm sorry about what happened to you but I know one day you'll find a woman who you'll have connection both mentally, physically and spiritually. I believe your fate will change for the better; no good or bad experience will last; everything usually come to an end and you will find an understanding woman. |
 | Posted Aug 10th, 2009 at 7:56AM I sure relate to everything you said. What is a relationship without substance? Seems like we end up there again and again.I think we are seeking for the same substance. To base a relationship on 2 people and common interests, not superficial looks. Looks do matter a bit but not near as much as the all important connection. I would love to get to know you better if you can give me a chance.Thanks and i do understand. |
 | Posted Aug 26th, 2009 at 8:06PM The mind has a way of steeling itself against further pain... You have been hurt, one way or another, and you find it only natural to hesitate to open up to someone. I have been in this place too, for different reasons. I would offer some advice, but I don't have any. I suspect I'm stuck in a similar rut, a mix of unable and unwilling to take those important chances... |
 | Posted Oct 5th, 2009 at 5:36AM It's just a matter of time before you meet your equal. Life is a journey. You meet, you greet, you retreat and you learn new things along the way. It is good when you are able to find yourself first before your soul mate finds you. She is somewhere out there, also looking for you. The moment you meet her, everything will fall in place, and you will know. Just like that. Very simple. I wish you the best of luck on your life journey. |
 | Posted Oct 30th, 2009 at 2:31PM I can so relate to your experience. I am glad that you did go on a quest to find YOU...I need to go on that journey to find myself and then too maybe my soulmate will come once I know the REAL me. All will be fine for you and for me as well. |
| Posted Nov 5th, 2009 at 7:26AM 4hrs away isn't that big of a complication. You need to make sure there's NOTHING there between the two of you romantically before one of you does something stupid and ends up marrying the wrong person - that happened to me and we've both been regretting it ever since b/c we discovered too late how much love a soul-mate can give & we've both been missing out & feel trapped into staying that way. Complicated doesn't even begin to describe. You need to find a way to talk to his girl again. |
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