I Wish I Did Not Have A Heart Sometimes!

> Some days I wish I wish I could go back to theold me, high, thick walls where no one could get into or climb over, where I could not feel a thing...then it would not hurt so much. 

> just like phychics...I feel everything around me, I am way too sensitive and get too stressy over it from everything that influences me, then it changes my moods out of whack....and I usaully get hurt as well.

> I open my self up, and in the end I get hurt. I expect people to respect my feelings and precious heart, that my words are important, and in the end I get hurt. I share my words of love and feelings, and they get slammed, wish I would not feel some times. i am very expressive, I like to share my feelings, I like to let people know how I feel, I am too weak, I need to harden up and not have such a big heart, like all tells me, wish I did not at times!
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3 Responses Mar 10, 2010

I read your story and then i read your comment your are just like my wife and your right it makes for a bad marrage you can't go through life like this!! What is the reason for living if you have no one to enjoy it with feelings good or bad you need them! I have been married for 24 years and they haven't been all that great but i'm still trying nothing worth wild is easy. I learned from being on here is to make your feelings heard and to just tell your love one just what you want don't hold back and it's working. So don't shut yourself out i think your a better person than that from what i have read so far!

If you harden yourself too much you turn into stone

I understand how you feel. I still have that wall around my heart to protect myself, and it hurts to let anyone in, even if they haven't hurt me yet, because I am absolutely convinced they eventually will. When I'm being rational, I know it is worth the risk. When I'm not being rational, I hurt those people to try to drive them away. <br />
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Most of them figured it out though, and the ones who are worth it, understand and forgive me when I get back to being rational again.