I'm Tired Of Being Black

i hate being stereotyped.. i hate being at the bottom of the dating pool. i hate that my hair is nappy and doesn't grow as fast as other races. i feel like i was born in the wrong race...i hate that people act like black girls don't have souls and or some kinda of caricuture who doesn't matter, that if im raped or kill it wont matter because i'm not white or anything else....i have hated being black since i was 4. being black is a curse..and before you say it isn't.. look at history look around you...doesn't it feel like one?
blackmagic88 blackmagic88
22-25, F
34 Responses Jul 19, 2011

I can relate. Try making being who you are a blessing. Whatever you can do that brings joy and fulfillment in this life, whether it's driving down a country road in the spring, learning a new skill, creating something uniquely beautiful, etc. just find things to do that don't require others to validate, or to provide input. Enjoy your own little world made pleasant for yourself and where you matter most. It will be way healthier than focusing on the world that feels like a curse to you.

Although I am not black, I know how you feel. Being an American woman of Asian descent (Korean/Filipino), I understand what it's like not being "white". I feel that all minority groups in this country have it difficult to some degree. I don't mean to compare, but I'm just being honest here. There are no Asians in music, hardly any in movies (just a few here and there), they're presence is absent in sports, politics, etc. Black and Hispanics are represented quite well in all of these areas. Obama is President which is a huge deal. Even looking at this current presidential race, you have Hispanics and a black man in the top polls. There is NO WAY an Asian person would ever make it that far in any political race, nevermind the President. Most Americans still view us very much as foreigners. No matter how great I speak English or even when I say that I've been here all my life, There's still the question " so where are you really from?".So although Asians aren't normally viewed as "second class" so to speak, there are challenges. For years, I felt insecure because the media and Hollywood don't like Asians for some reason . Only whites, blacks and Hispanics are represented. So for a long time I've felt pretty invisible in this country. Not to mention all the stereotypes that go with being of Asian descent. But on another note, I have a very strong spiritual faith and I know that in reality, we are not the body. We are timeless, eternal.spirit temporarily inhabiting a body here on Earth. The body is not who we are.

Im very blonde with Lilly skin white and because I'm very * white looking even compared to many whites!

I get the race card treatment often times by minorities, treated as if im a raciest only because *my body looks like typical stereo type white raciest!

I treat everyone with love, no matter how they may appear. :)

Add a response...

I think, looking at the age of this post, i will reply anyway.....There were times in my life i hated being a man, and there were times when i hated being white. I didn't get to choose the skin I wear, but if i did, it would have been blue....because I know that I am unique and cool, and if you are unique and cool, it does not matter what color you are, even if you are blue.

I feel the same, but this is how I see it, when i look in the mirror, I think wow, I'm beautiful but let me put this weave in before I go to this interview, oh let me put this cream on to lighten me up a bit.... the opportunities are there for white person, me I have to scrape, scratch and be 10X more polite and its exhausting, I just want to live and not struggle so damn hard and yes, I may have to try to look like a white woman

Sorry u go through that. Hope things get better for you. Be blessed

I think people are missing the point here. human beings are social creatures. although self love is important it doesn't take away from the hurt of being isolated from the people around you based on character traits you DON'T EVEN HAVE. It hurts when you walk into a place and everyone tenses up to to see if you'll cause a scene or when you browse online dating ads and everyone seems to exclude blacks from their preferences. the idea that she is somehow weak or needs to buck up and love herself is bullsh*t. She's making an honest assessment of a painful situation and we need to learn to embrace that some of us although perfectly secure on the inside eventually grow tired of not being seen for who we are on the inside because of the endless wave of preconceived notions about us based on something we had jack squat to do with. I'm black and I love myself but it wears you down. Just human. give her a break. And for the record it absolutely IS unique to blacks. No other race's stereotypes (as harmful as they all are) peg them immediately as threats, and criminals or unsophisticated or dead beat dads. Not to mention being more visibly distinct than any other race. All stereotyping is bad but its a little hurtful when you realize others take comfort and seeing you as the bottom.

Bitxh get some back bone and love yourself first or no one will so if you don't have nice straight hair or pale skin if you love your nappy hair or your hair body and soul then others would say the same

fxck off

I'm proud to be who I am, but I must say that as a black male, we have gotten away from the things our ancestors fought for; education, voting, and other opportunities. We fought for the right to go to school, now you have to fight us to get us to go to school. It's the same thing with voting. We hated to be called the "n" word, but now we use it as a term of endearment and can find every excuse possible to justify our ignorance.

yourfavteacher......... i could not agree more ....thank you someone with some insight!!finally

sadly thats the downside of being black.. alot of us don't do these things but we are grouped together with those who do

If it was possible for people to switch white people including myself would get screwed. I'd trade with you if I could because I have the curiosity of Pandora but if I take everything I hear seriously and I do I'd probably hate it after 2 months. I wish we could just switch back and forth every 6 months so nobody has to be black full time and everyone has experience being treated in different ways.

All people are stereotyped by people that are too scared to feel. They want everything to be wrapped up in an explanation that covers everything. If you are at the bottom of a dating pool that is you're own fault. I say that because its a mental thing. My best friend growing was over weight like a great deal. SHE WAS THE MOST POPULAR GIRL IN SCHOOL! Her husband is fine and she has always pulled fine dudes. Why because she believes she deserves the best and that's what she gets. Her smile radiates and she is the most beautiful of the woman that place too much importance on bull. I knew I wanted to be around her from the moment I met her. She actually told me she didn't want to hang out w/ me when I met her again through our mutual friend Daniel Davis (a gorgeous dark skinned black girl and also the sister of Viola Davis yes that one!). I pursued her friendship and we are friends 24 years later Daniel too. I have always been pursued by white men ,but does that mean I'm more desirable? I've never had black boys come after me and thought that's too bad. My husband is white but when we dated for almost a year he divulged that he think I would stay w/ him because he wasn't black. He puts Africans (& their descendants on a pedestal). I've witnessed this several time through men I've dated acting like wow you gave me the time of day and other situations...for instance I was visiting in Miami and saw a sign that said "extras". I walked over and said " hey I want to be an extra". I was told how to do that which was to go to this agency that is doing all of the casting. So you do a video about yourself so they can see you on film. I mentioned that my mother is African (which she is...she comes from a part that has the most Euro-Afro mix in the world so yes my mother is technically 3/4's white). They loved this fact because Oliver Stone had specifically requested African women. I was in!i already knew that I wasn't dark enough. Blah blah I wasn't dark enough! Instill got to be an extra because he wanted the African woman to be his girl! He found one and they looked happy.

As far as your hair girl they had me fooled too but we have dry hair not bad hair we have fragile hair not bad hair. Like I said my mother is 3/4 white my father on the other hand is THE blackest of black in history. So I'm a deep brown with his hair. I started dreading when I was 17 and cut those at the age of 27 I went through this brief period of hair envy. I have a brother and sister older than me that have a different dad. My siblings are 100% Cape Verdian (African) but technically they are also about 3/4 white. Their dad is pale with green eyes. They both have curly hair. So I feel you on being a little envious. It was in my face. I didnt really care about it except for you want to look like your family. my envy wasthe. Lack girls with weaves. I could not feel comfortable because I knew it wasn't my real hair. (to each his/her own). So I found out how to take care of my hair naturally because I didnt learn from my mom or sister because they had no clue of how to deal w/my hair. Man now I get compliments from all cultures because my hair looks awesome even more so because how I feel about it. Just to let you know no one cultures hair grows faster ours just breaks a lot because it dry and fragile.

Race their is no such thing as race. It's an antiquated system put in place by scientist that wanted to appease those that give in to bullshit. they wanted to make a name for there selves by utilizing people's ignorance and hatred. Scientist are now reporting truth.

Lastly I super duper love you and wish you didn't feel cursed.

ok could you tell us exactly what you did to your hair, products you used? procedures in washing, caring? thanks

3 trolls on this story all talking to each other they have no back stories jut an empty profile

Dear Girl never hate who or what you are. We all hav gifts. Do not let ignorance dictate to u who u are. You are an individual with many talents like art n writing you you can go far. Look at all the blacks who hae already. Look into all history made THE buffalo Soilders tuskegee aair pilots Be proud and percervere!

And see what they had to go through and some were killed when they came back to there homes, how do I know, my grandfather was a buffalo Soldier out of Fort Leavenworth

OMG! It IS a curse!!! People HATE us! ESPECIALLY with all of the crap going on in this last month! It's terrible and I don't think things will ever change:/ Being black sucks;(

I don't hate you and neither does God. (((((hugs)))))

How in hell do you know what God likes or hates If he or she loved us black folks would he had put us in slavery for four hunderd years let white men rape black women without recourse for them kill black men for whatever reason master or mistress felt.

Unfortuntately my friend, even though God loves us, people make terrible choices due to our free will. I do believe that people reap what they sow eventually, especially if they do not turn from their wicked ways.

I will not lecture. I know that can be irritating. I just hope you can find the peace and answers you need.
Be blessed.

Ignorant hate ignorant black people.

1 More Response

I just turned 25 and I just not to long ago realized that being black is a curse. It seems like no matter how well you carry yourself or all the positive things you do in life, being black will only get you so far. I mean I'd rather not be of any other race, but being black has been no reward. I've had an extremely hard life since I was young, wondering if and why God didn't love me. I've played tug of war with my life against the devil. Often times and still now, I asked and prayed God to relieve me of this world. I too fear having children because I don't want them to face these same struggles. Being black has truly been a burden of pain for me. The sad part is that as long as other blacks continue to make fools of themselves we will always be looked down upon, and never be able to climb that latter. It's hurts to walk around and fear your own people because of the way they present themselves to the world. For instance, would you not be skeptical of the black guy with his pants sagging, hat turned everyway but straight and cursing out loud. Or take for instance the hip hop/ rap music we make and listen to. Those are images that the world sees and that's why we all suffer, because of fools.

I in part agree but seeing that we're only 17% of the population we aren't even the main people buying that music. You have to be the change you want to see. Don't judge a book by its cover is such an old saying that people just don't heed to when they should. Someone could say your stance is just as ignorant. The music that is made is an expression of life that person lived and so how can you look down on art. I mean you can but ask yourself is this your own opinion or the one of that part of you that wants to be accepted by whites. The kind of white person that hates you hates what you remind them of in their selves. You can't do anything about someone else's insecurity. You can own yours though.

I remember when I was younger (10-16), and would listen to rap music. It made feel so violent, and made me want to go out and fight, take things, sag my pants, join a gang, etc. I was once a young man that lived in a poor neighborhood, my only peers being gang members or just thugs. I remember living that exact life that I wrote about in my prior blog, and I wouldn't openly express that in detail to anyone. Which goes to say, black youths don't listen to the music and want to grow or learn from the artist's mistakes, but instead they tend to except and want to live that life. It's sucks to have to fear our youths.

My concern is never to be accepted by another race, but to be accepted as any other person, but it sucks to see another race act as superior and practically have dreamful opportunities thrown at them, while other races get the lesser part of the deal.

Anyway, I just want to see fellow black people evolve and become better influences to our youth, and also understand that in this country their actions reflect a lot of us.

I feel the same way. Never want to have kids because they will have to face the same. Tired of being ignored. Boys do chase me but usually after they couldn't get some white friend of mine. So I turn them all down. No matter how much talent you have, somehow being dark makes you feel pathetic about yourself at the end of the day. :(

<p>????<br />
it seems like SOOOO many blacks (Not all) are believing all this brainwash and garbage and letting it into their psyches! Please, stop letting mean racists who are CLUELESS define who you are. You don't have to walk around feeling like a "loser" or "out of place." I know God wants to show you his identity and who you are in Him.</p><p>I don't mean to preach here, i realize not all of you are religious,but please realize my heart is in the right place and i am hear to offer encouragement and edification, not a religious lecture. that is my heart. but this has been on myheart for a long time now. This "I hate being black" stuff is WRONG!!! You are FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made in the image of GOD. The reason you are treated horribly is NOT because you are INFERIOR. It is because Satan HATES you. Rejoice that you are a THREAT to his plans! It shows you how precious you really are in the sight of God.</p><p>There is a very high chance Jesus was black and blacks may be part of the tribe of Judah. Shame does NOT belong on ANY of you!! Get if off!<br />
Even if Jesus wasn't black, blacks are very intelligent, creative, wonderful people. Please guys, stop letting this stuff into your psyche. It's terrible. God bless you all.</p>

<p>Your hair, my friend, is very unique and beautiful! In fact, in Africa, before blacks were brought over here, black ladies had the right oils in their country to care for their hair. Our country didn't hae the same oils that Africa had and as a result, black ladies had to make do with what was in this country. I realize that may not be relevent, just want you to view your head as lovely and unique, and with the right care, can really look amazing.<br />
<br />
PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE do not think that ALL white people or ALL other people have a low opinion of your race! Please sweetie! This is a LIE perpetrated by the Father of Lies, the devil. These caricitures are ridiculous. In fact I read an article today stating that Satan hates Jews and Blacks especially! Satan hates what God loves. Balcks are mentioned in the Bible in a POSITIVE light. you are NOT subhuman. I can't imagine the hurt being stereotyped must feel like, but once you have the TRUTH of who you really are and how special your people really are, that will change. Do not judge yourself by other peoples ignorance.</p>

I really can't explain it. Every day I wake up theres this emptyness that I cant shake. I have everything in life a person could want. Great parents, money, room and board, but every week I have to find some place away from everything thing and everyone and cry my soul out. I am a model person, a real door mat, so when my soul mate left me it did'nt even surprise me. I guess some are born to hate and not love, but some like me are born to give love but not receive. Its been 29 years of life so far, and I guess im just tried of it. Honest black folk know escally what im talking about. there is a unsung language all back men know, and for the first time in my life im gonna confess something. all that bulshit about try hard and think big its bull ****! its all bull ****. how many jobs have i been fired from being the best worker. how many times to gotta walk around and people treat you like your invisiable cuz your black? I'm tried of the police ******* with me all the time, and sometimes the lonleyness over takes me, even when i with dozens of people. I have considered many times not having children, just for the fact I dont want my son to go through the...amost, imsurmountable trials and dangers that I, my God, mabey..barely survived. I sorry if im hurting anyone, i dont mean to, but this has been botted up inside me for 29 years, and i had to come here because i wonder if I'm the only one who feel like this. Also, my beautiful sisters, i feel your pain. We men complain but we will never understand the trials you all go thru. I have a older sister, and I have seen her come thru stuff I dont think I could bear. being black has robbed me from so many things that my peers have taken for granted. good jobs, true love. I have a best friend. He mexican, he'll never know the **** we face. Be strong, I know, but i just dont know how

I hear ya!

Jonathanwet your post brought tears to my eyes because this year I am turning 29 and ive never left so happy. My whole life I have battled with this and even though im a woman, every word you wrote resonated with me. Its like reading my own thoughts. Everyday I ask "whats the point of being here" I will never have love. Iv watched my six uncles only ever date white women my whole life and never been prettier enough as my mixed raced sisters. I too dont think I'll have children because I never want them to feel this way. Although I wish and pray you didnt feel as you do, thank you for sharing your thoughts it has given me great comfort that I am not alone because I all my life I have not been able to express this without feeling evil or a terrible person. Thank you


im sorry you feel this way. I know God loves you. I believe the devil attacks your people group a lot. I believe you are actually very precious to the Father and that many of you are all over the scriptures. You are not evil or a terrible person sweetie. I believe that since sooooo many blacks feel the way you are feeling, there is something going on in the spiritual realm. I believe you are probably one of the twelve tribes of Israel. That would explain a lot of the depression and attacks your precious people are falling into.

You may already know this, but below is a link about the moors (black people) who ruled over the Europeans for about 800 years. The moors brought many wonderful things to Spain. I hope it lifts your spirit. you are worthy and loved. Also, many of the "white inventions" were really invented by blacks. Not saying you should feel bitter toward whites, just know you are incredibly valuable. Shalom.


I feel your pain young lady. No matter how educated you are and regardless of your social status, there is always the daily reminder of being a black woman. As many have mentioned in this post, I am also very introverted as well, I do not care to socialize nor to date due to the fact that I do not meet the criteria of most black men in the looks department. If a black man is interested in me it is usually the OLD, broke, and no good black men with alot of baggage I am not willing to deal with. The young guys who want to date me are immature and do not have themselves together, thus anticipating to be taken care of. As a professional woman, in the workplace I do not receive the recognition that I deserve rather it is more work being piled on me while my white counterparts get to sit back and relax. I can go on about every aspect of my life and how being black affects it, but no need to waste time. I will just have to endure to the end until Jesus calls me home.

YOU are FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made! A daughter of the MOST HIGH GOD. Clothed in righteousness! A CROWN awaits you. Satan wants you to not focus on that, but believe his lies.

Psalm 34 verse 5-Please look it up. Be blessed.

im white, but i read your post and it made me sad. It's quite old so I don't know if you even come on here anymore.
(Your Heavenly Father thinks you're pretty). I am not being facicious. People that think crazy things about blacks (they have no souls, etc) are of course wrong.

Your people have been horribly mistreated, but being black is not a curse. In fact, people who use the Bible to prove this are WRONG.
Blacks are some of the nicest, most creative people I know. Please don't beat yourself up or hate yourself. Just let people in your inner circle that are going to love you just the way you are.

I realize you may not be religious, but I am praying for you to feel and experience how God sees you and how much he loves you.


what history does not tell you is that most blacks were captured by other war tribe members,

sold to slave traders, so pretty much the blacks actually added to the slavery by selling their own people.

the people who really got a raw deal were the American Indian, whites took their land moved them off of the land, onto a reservation where most still live in poverty.

where as most blacks have gov housing, a medical card and food stamps and a lot have jobs and a real chance to live a good life in America.

yes read more... i know of those others, since i am married to one of those kind.... what i wrote was just a comment, not a story of all who have been wronged.

Black isn't a curse just like you said look at what us blacks been thru we been thru a lot that is what makes are culture so strong you should really be proud to be black and try some therapy

the blacks from 100 years ago have gone through a lot compared to modren day blacks...


if a 16 or 20 year old today is complaining about slavery, I feel they have little to complain about compared with even what their parents, grandparents or great grandparents endured in the way of discrimination or mistreatment even 50 years ago. I guess the legacy of slavery will always be around in one form or another.

Yeah, we should stop complaining because things aren't AS bad as they used to be! You can't be serious... Just stop talking.

ok ncrensh ill take the bait....

yes I am !!! serious!

So current blacks should just be happy that things aren't as bad as they used to be? We shouldn't be upset at the current state of inequality in this country because, hey, it used to be worse... I understand the concept of perspective, but things are still NOT easy for blacks, and we are allowed to be upset!

I'm not even going to reply to this.

That's weird to hear you guys telling blacks to stop complaining. When Indians complain about their struggles, people feel for them. When the people talk about the Holocaust, people feel sorry for what happened to Jews. As soon as blacks mention anything, people tell us to stop complaining. This is why I hate America.

Southerndixie, do your research if you think the Native Americans don't have their issues. And do your homework if you think white people don't have their issues. In fact, why don't you educate yourself on all of the real issues that blacks and Native Americans face before you speak. Matter of fact, just get off of this thread, no one wants to hear you blame an entire race for the ****** things that some of us have done. I'm just curious, what made you come to this thread? Troll much??

I never said I hated you. And this thread originated from the EXPERIENCE of a black woman (you have none) who wanted to vent and share her frustrations. The fact that you feel entitled to jump on it and say negative things about our culture is inappropriate, and if you can't see that then you are the type of person we are venting about on this thread; those that stereotype us, put us all in one category, etc. I can almost asure you that no one on this thread is burning down a city, so coming on here and telling us that black people burn down cities must just be you trying to get a rise out of people, mainly the blacks, on this thread. I can tell this is fun for you:) Feel free to continue to speak your mind about how blacks "play the race card," "burn down cities," "should look to Jews," "should look to Native Americans," "have children without being married," look up to rappers and athletes, etc.... every person on this thread really appreciates the time and energy you have put into letting us know that you don't much care for blacks. It's fine, we don't need you:) You have a good life, I'm choosing not to waste anymore of mine going back and fourth with someone of your nature. Have a blessed day;D

I had to register to respond to such ignorant comments. First off, jews do not share the same complexion as blacks and benefit from their ability to blend and assimilate. Hitler shared jewish heritage and didn't even notice. Second, the jews were allowed by western nations to have their own First World country and receive consistent financial backing from the US gov. Which Makes a Huge difference in social relations here in America. Name one first world African country that isnt exploited by international corporations for resources, or proxy governments via neo-colonialism (now, china is getting involved in this business too). Your comparison to other races is dismal. At least the jews were allowed to keep their names, traditions, language and religion. Only black immigrants and refugees from recent conflicts have such opportunities and they receive worst treatment than any other demographic. Just because things are "better" now does not mean its favorable or even decent compared to other minorities. That notion of submissive acceptance toward modern day racism is appalling.

From reading your comments I would not be shocked if you were a neo nazi. The native americans in north america were nearly wiped out to extinction and marginalized on tiny plots of land. And your response only credits their survival with "casino's". You should hear their personal accounts of what discrimination was like in the 60's and 70's for northern tribes along the canadian border.

Your one sick and twisted individual, I hope you never have to live life others have been through, you wouldn't survive.

hello jup/ bull awwwww I can see by the first line you wrote, you don't support educating your children ? to think different? why not??

the old way is obviously not working !!!! if it was, you all would not be out rioting demonstrating

bull have you read the history of the Jewish people? they have been known to be the whipping children for centuries


Many healthy, young strong Jews were not killed immediately. The Germans' war effort and the “Final Solution” required a great deal of manpower, so the Germans reserved large pools of Jews for slave labor. These people, imprisoned in concentration and labor camps, were forced to work in German munitions and other factories, such as I.G. Farben and Krupps, and wherever the Nazis needed laborers.

They were worked from dawn until dark without adequate food and shelter. Thousands perished, literally worked to death by the Germans and their collaborators. In nearly every country overrun by the Nazis, the Jews were forced to wear badges marking them as Jews, they were rounded up into ghettos or concentration camps and then gradually transported to the killing centers.

AThe death camps were essentially factories for murdering Jews. The Germans shipped thousands of Jews to them each day. Within a few hours of their arrival, the Jews had been ******** of their possessions and valuables, gassed to death, and their bodies burned in specially designed crematoriums. Approximately 3.5 million Jews were murdered in these death camps.


yes iv heard Hitler was Jew, what does that have to with blacks vs jews???

if your trying to make a picture of who was persecuted more !!

it wont work!!!! sorry, do what the Jews have done and get an education .open up stores to make jobs. etc

im not a neo Nazi and if I was I would not be promoting the Jewish culture !!!now who is ignorant!!!

If your words were pure, honest, and truthful then I wouldn't have a scrap of logic and rationale to stand on. And again you missed the entire value or point I was addressing. Go google each and every statement I made in my original post. There is factual research, evidence and 100% historical information on everything I said. And no, its not about bashing other atrocities or disasters that other races experienced; its the fact that you presented FALSE information displaying your ignorance on the subject.

You did get some information right in your counter-intuitive response. Yes, estimates between 6-8 million jews died in german camps (yet 20 million soviet troops died fighting off hitler, which is more than what the allied forces commited to stop genocide). However you Completely missed the reason why I addressed hitler in my first post, Your Racial Comparisons are Dismal. The truth is, their is no comparison between the experiences of the jews, natives, or blacks. Your comments are filled with lies, sweeping generalizations, and flawed logic. Which is why I associated your displayed ignorance with neo nazi's. Do not bother responding to my post, its obvious that your a) a commited racist. b) under the influence of a psychodelic narcotic. c) a socially functional individual with developmental challenges. Or d) a brainwashed person who was fundamentally raised to think for themselves. Either way it is evident that the ignorance you displayed coupled with selective reasoning is what perpetuates the racism that we see today, and the source of what the jews, natives, and blacks experienced in the past.

I recommend you experience culture shock by traveling or seek counseling. Pick up a book, it doesn't hurt to learn the truth.

13 More Responses

Well, I originally got on here feeling sorry for myself because I am also a black woman, I am a business woman but I don’t get respect like my white counterpart. Everybody I come across in business wants to treat me like I am dumb. They can cheat me out my smart *** time. I know so much they try to use it for themselves. Just try to use me the hell up. But after reading all of these black women talk about themselves. Guess what ? I don’t want to be a white woman; never have. I really don’t give a dam about a white man(had serveral Sex not good). I cannot stand they ***. I pray that God helps me with that. I don’t want my skin looking like that. What ! the black is fine. I worked for some of the richest white woman who made their millions off slavery and they loved our skin the lady I work for said they like the way the pores are so close together and that we don’t age fast as they do. We are just dumb enough to believe the BS. They love our skin why don’t we. Hell I just wish Black people would quit hating themselves and each other we don't get alone at all. Stop the Hate !

yes stop the hate ...poor gabby was being hated on because of her hair... her hair looked fine!!!! im white, but why hate on her because of her hair.... her culture should rally around her and feel proud!

Its ok, im a black girl and im considered "cute" for a black girl and i hate myself. I wish i were mixed or just something else in general. It sucks to be black.

((((No it doesn't))) You have a lot to offer. What "sucks" is how mean people are, it's not being black tht is the problem. Do not worry. God uses everything in our lives for a reason. Perhaps you will be a much more sensitive caring person because you know what it feels like to be picked on.

Please do not let the opinions of ignorant mean people shape you!

Hey im a black guy im 24 and sometimes i wanna kill myself im always gonna be black so im always wrong , always seen as a theif even though im respectful of athourty , kind , and in lack of nothing . I feel like i have no place in the world

The problem isn't that you suck because you're black. I'm a black woman, and I have never had problems dating men of the opposite race... Actually, I can't remember a time when I dated a black man, and I've been with my white boyfriend for 6 months. When you loathe yourself, it seeps through your pores and people can smell it on you. Would you want to date someone who is negative all the damn time? Maybe you guys should see life for what it's worth and drop the negative attitude. You don't have a relationship because you aren't healthy enough for one. I'll repeat myself... no one wants to date a Debbie Downer, and seriously, that's what a lot of you are.

I'm a year late, but here I am. I know exactly how you feel. It seems what's considered beautiful in the Caucasian and Asian races is exactly the opposite of the Black Race. It's my belief that during slavery in America, blacks were treated so abominably, they had little or no sense of self worth. This was buried in the subconscious, but yet passed on from generation to generation. Today, it's not as profound as it was many years ago, but it still exists within many blacks.

im all for raising ur children with new ways of thinking to empower them sevles... but if they are living among other children who were raised with the old thinking, it will be a tug of war for the parent to keep that child thinking they have self worth .. the peers have a strong death grip, like no other...

I am a white female, but I agree with Fleurdelis9. The good news is the way you feel about yourself can change and you no longer have to have these lies torment your subconscious any longer. Meditate on your Heavenly Father's love for you. That is all that matters. The more you know how much he loves you, the more these lies will slip away in time.

Desc<x>ription: Black female, age 21, dark skin, natural type 4 hair. I understand the frustration, especially the frustration of being grouped with the stereotypes that black women are dumb, controlling, bitchy, can't speak proper English, and are on welfare with 8 kids and 7 baby daddies. But understand that self-pity is not going to do anything for you in this lifetime, because one thing people will never care for are people who don't care for themselves. If you believe in the Lord, believe that He made you in His image, and made you to be the best you. At some point you have to look society in the eye and say "SCREW YOU" and focus on people who appreciate you. (ie. That sexy white guy isn't interested in you because you're black? God's way of protecting you from fools) Keep your heads up.


Type 1 hair is straight. Type 2 hair is wavy. Type 3 hair is curly. But type 4 hair is coily. Most black people refer to it as nappy, because the coils tangle with each other making it difficult to comb. But the beautiful thing about it is that even though it looks short, when the coils are stretched out, the hair length can increase up to 75%! And a simply splash of water helps soften and loosen the hair when styling!


oh ok then my hair is between a 3 and 4 . if i do nothing with it, mine turns into dread locks...i need to find a hair care product that works with my hair..iv tried all kinds of products have yet to find one that works.... mine breaks off and i get knots in it big time... i have never had long hair do to it breaking off...

Try kinky curly. I heard they have shampoo called Knot today. I will try myself.

ill have to try it too thanks for thr advice

I hope I am not being intrusive, being a white lady reading these posts. I have a black friend who has had issues with her hair. When she received a bathwater dechlorinator her hair stopped breaking.
Home Depot sells shower filters Sprite it's called. they are like twenty bucks and the filter lasts six months. It's a universal filter and easy to install.
((((BTW, I think your people are very fun to hang out with. God made you all very pretty))))

oh wow that makes sense.... hmmmm damn bleach in water... another thing too don't use hair products that has sulfur in them

4 More Responses

Hi <br />
I just wanted to say that I also feel ur frustrating. I have dark skin which I LOVE, but I can't stand the fact that we are at the bottom of the dating pool. I've never had a boyfriend and I'm getting old, never been asked out, nobody has ever even given me a chance mainly because I am shy, but I also think its because of the fact that I am a black female. I do tend to get annoyed because of the way women of other races are treated especially White and Asian women. Online when I do talk to ppl they always mistake me for those two races, and sometimes I am even afraid to tell them that I am black out of fear that they will not talk to me (it has happened twice). <br />
<br />
PPL like to say to say that black women are jealous of white women. I am not jealous of them, I am annoyed of the way SOCIETY makes them as if they are the best and we are the worst. I am tired of almost every website saying black women are ugly, black women are this and that.. black women are not beautiful. It has really taken a toll on my self image and I have developed extreme social anxiety because of it. I have become extremely introverted because of this and for once I just hope that some ppl would consider looking past black women in general.


I am a white female =). I do NOT think your people are ugly, and more importantly, God doesn't think that either. A lot of these people that say such horrible things are trolls trying to start trouble. It can be the same two or three, hiding under different names and starting other awful threads.
I can only hope that none of the opinions of others has harmed your psyche.

it is we should jst kill ourselves no one like us lets just find somewhwere else to go

(((((NO, don't do that)))))
You have soooooo much to offer this world. Just let the right people in your inner circle. People that love and appreciate you for who you are. Guard your heart, don't harden it. Keep the mean people out of your inner circle.

but I'll be honest with you guys, I am not saying I am any better but...<br />
<br />
cmon<br />
<br />
be strong.<br />
<br />
I wouldn't want to be with a weakling, would you ?

you people think the grass is greener at the neighbour's house ?<br />
<br />
open your eyes

I am saddened by you people<br />
<br />
for one you have no faith in life, no faith in yourselves<br />
<br />
"nobody wants me"<br />
<br />
grow the **** up

I know what you mean. I hate being a dark skin black female. Everybody wants to say your need to "love yourself" but they know they would never want to trade places with you. As much as I love my sister, I know she secretly feels this way because she has "good hair" and "light skin" so she doesn't understand. Everybody treats you like you're stupid, men pretty much think you're invisible -of all races- and you can never really fit in with anyone if you don't act like the stereotypical black chick. Black people will call me "oreo" but yet whites and other races think I'm "ghetto" so I can never win. I also wish I didn't have to be at the bottom of the dating pool. Most guys aren't checking for women like me. I'm not fat and I take good care of my body inside and out but that still isn't good enough. I would love to be a white woman. They have it all. White men love them and black men absolutely adore them. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way. I always feel left out when I go out with my sister because men of all races like her. I'm lucky to get 1 guy to want to date me. I've become an introvert over the past few years because I just don't like the way society views women like me. I don't see the point of trying to socialize anymore because I'll never be the "hot" woman white guys like or the "dimepiece" black ones like. White women should never take their position for granted. They really do have it the best. I don't hate them for it, I just wish I was them so I can know what it is like to be desired and loved.

Very poignant.

Have you thought of avenues where you can socialize in way that's more interest based or intellectual? This way, it's less about being"hot" and more about what you have to offer.

I'm not even going to lie, I wish I wasn't black either. Black people today are just so... so... I dunno, like the black youth of today have no direction. It's like they're crazy or something. I blame alot of this on stupid hip hop music and that whole thug mentality. They think going to jail is cool, having babies out of wedlock is the "it" thing. Sometimes I feel like I'm a rare black person, the kind of black person all black people should be like b/c they would be no crime and everybody would have gone to college and have an entrepeneurial spirit. And what is so annoying is that these rappers have more influence than our President, yet many of them don't use it to their advantage for positivity. The black youth of today isn't aspiring to be like the President O, they're aspiring to be like the thug and hoodrats on the street. I dunno what's become of our race. I fear for this generation and the next generation.

I don't think I would go that far. Perhaps that is what you see in the media? Is this really the image you see around you every day? I'm just curious... I'm black, female, 31, working on my PhD in chemistry (nuclear medicine), and I've come to the realization that the media gives more attention to when we do bad versus when we do good. For example, the guy that rescued those 3 women who had been missing for 10 years (I think it was for that long), instead of painting him in a good light, they ran a background check, publicitized their findings, and plastered it all over the networks in efforts to take away from his good deed. Here's the deal: There are a lot of white people out there that do not like us, and some of them are on this thread, insinuating that we're doing it wrong and that we need to look to the Jews for inspiration (ugh). Many people fear us, which is interesting to me because I think we fear them just as much if not more! Anyhow, my point is this: believe it or not, not every black person is bad, unintelligent, uneducated, or without direction, we just have the pleasure of being on the news a lot. And you saying that you're some rarity is an insult, you should be lifting us up, not setting yourself apart:) Go out and coach a sports team in a poor neighborhood, tutor the underprivileged, help start an after school program! We need to help each other! If you really think that black people are so terrible, then google some statistics and find out just how bad other races are, then you'll be asking yourself whay THOSE statistics don't seem to match the media's.