Will This Be It?

Sometimes, when I'm walking to class, or work, in all the hustle and bustle that fill my days I have these moments where I can't help but feel so alone. The ache of knowing that there won't be that text or phone call from that special person waiting for me to answer can be, not painful, but disheartening. It's something I struggle with, but never share with my friends because I don't want to be examined. They have that special someone, and it hurts to watch them take for granted or even abuse what I and others like me don't have or haven't ever experienced. I know I have the potential to make someone happy, I believe I could so easily. I watch other people and try to figure out what has worked for them, or if they are as alone as I am. It's a feeling that is hard to suppress, to stuff away. Life is too short to be consumed with such weighty thoughts of insufficiency, so why do I focus on them? Why can't I just be happy with what I have instead of wishing for more? Wishing to feel that glow that others have! Other people have things so much worse than I, so why do my feelings have to rebel and make me feel like this? Why does my brain wonder if this stagnant status quo will be it? To see love yet never feel it! What do other people do? How do they cope with this? I pretend it doesn't affect me, but when I scrutinize the faces that pass me by, I wonder if they feel it too.
BeRougerla BeRougerla
22-25
1 Response May 24, 2012

Everyone feels that way, sometimes ... your not alone :)