Constant Battle

I wish I wasn't so fat and that it was easier to find good, healthy prepared meals.  Some people can go out to eat and maintain their weight, more or less.  Me?  No way.  My grandmother lived in our house when I was growing up, and I always thought that every meal had to have bread and potatoes as a vegetable and dessert afterwards.  Her idea of snacks for after school was homemade cookies and milk, or a fresh fruit turnover.  I have killer (literally) recipes for coconut layer cake, pies, biscuits, and any kind of vegetable you could want....all prepared with bacon grease, of course.

By the time I was in college, I was up to 285 lbs at 5' 10".  I was miserable.  I went through different diets and yo-yo'ed between 290 and 245, but felt more angry than better.  I hated (and still hate) shopping and cooking for myself, and went through my twenties eating out, most often fast food, and I ballooned even more.  By 1992, I had topped out at 375 lbs.  I had a 58" waist, could not find a belt to fit me and therefore wore braces (suspenders) with everything.  Suits, jeans, casual slacks.  Tee shirts were my friend, and suit jackets looked like well-tailored hot water tank insulating blankets on me.  I wanted to die (and was doing a pretty good job of getting there.)  I went to a Christmas party that year and later saw a photograph of me in profile.  You would think that my own appearance wouldn't be a surprise, but I was completely shocked.

I joined Nutri-System, and the fact that the meals were complete and my portions were already determined was exactly what I needed.  I was able to afford the food for about 90 days, and in that time lost 110 lbs (and most of my savings!).  I didn't feel better, though, and found out that fast is not the best way to lose weight, unless you are in danger of dying and need an operation, but that kind of drastic weightloss occurs in a hospital. 

I got a grip on myself, about 80% or so, and that was enough.  I've remained faithful to the portion sizes and avoid sugar sodas and desserts as much as I can.  (like 80% of the time).  I am totally off of fried foods and only have fast food once a week, max.  I eat as much of my veggies and  fruits raw, and eat a whole lot more of them than I do meats.   Truth be told, the best I have ever felt is when I could stick to a vegan diet, but I love my eggs, cheese and steak too darn much.

I quit my office job back in the mid 90's and started working construction outside.  It was hard, but provided me the exercise I needed to get used to moving around every day.  I've lost an average of 1 lb a month, unless I plateau for three or four months, and that has worked.  Today, I am at 220 lbs and wear 40" waist pants.  A lot of the waist size is excess skin, and I have more muscle than I ever dreamed of having in college, so a normal weight for me would be 190 to 200 lbs, I think. I have developed upper body muscles and really good leg muscles, and somewhere under this big sack of skin I have for a stomach, I'm sure there's a six pack in the works.  Of course, I would require plastic surgery to have a body to show off, and I still have 20 to 30 lbs to reach my goal, but at 48 years old, with a face like mine, what good's a killer bod?  I'm just happy to be healthy enough to make my doctor happy. 
atmore atmore
46-50, M
6 Responses Dec 4, 2006

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Hello there Atmore,<br />
Wow I think you've done a great job. You've come a loong way and losing weight. I'd like to take a moment and say I noticed you are quick to put yourself down. No matter how good looking a person is. If they don't have Jesus Christ they truly have nothing. It's the in side of a person that makes the person because looks will come and go. But kindness and mercy are never forgotten it's here to stay. I have found a really great meal management system. It's given me health and the ability to maintain a proper weight. Till next time you've done a great job. yours truly dtlgilbo

I have trouble with my weight . I know what it is like.

First and foremost conrats on your wieght loss, I wish you the best

You should be really proud of yourself. Alot of people are in the situation that you were in and haven't found a way for themselves to get out of it.

Good for you! But screw the doctor... be happy enough to loose the weight to make YOU happy!!