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The Normal And The Wishful

Most of you are born normal and live life without ever having to wish for normalcy.
But for me and many like me this is just a dream that will never happen,I'm stuck some where between being normal and real I will never be real but in my mind.
I am drifting some where in real time,without being able to connect with reality.
My wish is ever present,but my reality is just a vapor.
I want to touch what I can't touch,and feel what I can't feel.
shelle48 shelle48 61-65, F 5 Responses May 8, 2012

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Although our circumstances are entirely different I know how it feels not to connect and I do hope things get better for you. What you wrote was really touching.

Good dreams are held in the heart and never die, I will keep hope alive.

Why do you want to be normal? Do you think becoming a girl/woman would make you normal and therefore happy? Even after having a complete sex change you would still be DIFFERENT... Do you want to blend in with just being another one of the girls; or do you want to stand out from other women as UNIQUE? And believe me different/unique is never normal... Truth be told NORMAL IS F-u-c-king boring!!!!

Perhaps for you it is boring but I have never had that luxury.

Just wrote a 2000 word dissertation on how & why you feel the way you do Hun & the system dumped my entire story. I am so pissed I can't believe it. i'm sorry but not even going to try to duplicate it. I will say the theme was on how to use selfishness to maintain some degree of contentment in this life. That's all I should say now without being any more pissed off & pissed on by this system. The key is learning elements of survival. Kisses for everyone today especially you Shelly girl.

It lingers inside doesn't it.. but you know the problem is you feel it inside. You show normality on the outside..but you dont feel it..that's what I feel .. I feel so alone.. so abnormal.

have no words to say, but it really touch heart . . . . .

Thank you

Shelle, can't we share more