Understanding Taken In Hand ,,,,,,

I have been learning and searching for a few years now to find who I am and what I am as far as relationships go, I have always been naturally submissive.  Society has taught that it is weak for a women to be that way and that women are equal to men in all areas. I disagree. Please dont send me hate comments this is just my opinion..  I believe that a God designed relationship is for the Man to be the head of the house.  For the woman to fall under His God led authority. Different than a master/slave type of lifestyle.    I recently discovered through someone on the internet taken in hand. After numerous trial and error and being exposed to all levels of Dominant/ submissive relationships  I have found that a taken in hand relationship fits me best.
bettygirl45 bettygirl45
46-50, F
12 Responses Jul 19, 2010

Bossy men...some enjoy bossy men, I am NOT one of those kind of women. To each her own. I tend to speculate that some of the women are seeking the father they never had, that love/discipline kind of arrangement, they feel seen, heard, loved, understood, important to a man at last... it gets them attention to be "lorded" over, it makes them feel noticed, and...so OK~I had a wonderful father, I don't need another one, my sweet husband of three decades isn't my Daddy.

well good for you like all womenshould be<br />
i have been in CDD marriage for mnay years at first wife did ot submit to it but after periods of time failing marriage an the help of God we found CDD<br />
my wife is spank for when she does things wrong of if she just needs a spnaking<br />
she is my love of God an so happy that God puther on earth to submitt to me an to obey as he sees fit.<br />
God grant me the powers to install punishment on wife God gave me the will to not stop punishming her when she is kicking cryingabout he taught me thattill i ffeel that her punishment is finished that is why it is not when she deciedes.<br />
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My wife an I both pray to God an she does confess her sins an comes home to have me clean her soul of her fins over my knees

i agree with you i feel the same way as you.. i read somewhere: <br />
if you know your bible.. Genesis Adam and Eve remember she picked the fruit from the tree and gave it to Adam well someone once wrote ''if Adam had taken a thin branch from the tree and gave Eve a spanking then the world would be a different place'' lol i have often thought about this and i think this is a cool statement!! but instead he listened to her and both got into trouble with God!!

I thoroghly enjoy my submissive role in our home. Not sure about the "taken in hand" but if he said that is where we are going, then as a wife who vowed to obey, then I guess I'd be facing the paddle. Up to now, I've only ever been spanked for behavior just once. He's not informed me that it will be a regular occurance, but should he say so, then it is. He's the boss in our home, and I lovingly thank him for the opportunity to show him how much I love him by obeying his every command.

it's true. I live in the UK, and only a few people know this is how I live. I wouldnt dare to tell my family or best friends, they would judge us and especially my huisband, who is kind and gentle and a great person.

I am in a beautiful relationship that fills me with joy and purpose. I believe you are as well, dear bettygirl (and I like your name btw, even before the cute anecdote to go with it) :) It is quite painful to see such brilliance in some used for simply spewing self-hatred and confusion by way of chastising others for their choices in life. Personally, I have always believed females are meant to be submissive while men are meant to be dominant in this life. As for the sub-topic discussion of "another" lives... I have to wonder, what on earth would it matter to one that believed in reincarnation, if another is something that they, themselves, are not, if the entire premise for the belief in reincarnation is the idea that everyone will come back as something else at some point anyway?? <br />
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... but I digress a bit too much now... and so returning to the topic at hand of being taken IN hand... it's a lovely idea, and your story on how much you enjoy it leaves me with smiles for reading your words today, dear bettygirl:) Thank you for sharing, and since this is a bit older post originally, I do hope by now to find more of your words around here:)

new to this so somehow created new post using old email jandjw is bettygirl

WEll Well girls, except for you flowers who of course I would respectfully refer to you as woman... I certainly was hoping to find someone to encourage my new found sexual and emotional freedom. Flowers you stated that "everyone has to play out their beliefs until those beliefs change" It sounds to me that you must have experienced a lot of instability and often change your beliefs. Always searching for the right fit. I have no internal conflicts..I am sure that I am physically, spiritually ,mentally emtionally enhanced when a Man that has an adoring caring Love for me is in my life. I am financially, emotional secure with who I am that is why I am secure in embracing the person I am in my submission in a relationship..Taken in hand is spiritual based I am not bound nor made to adhere to any religion I have a deep faith in GOD and I do believe the moral standards in the bible have gone so off the track that people are becoming their own Gods lack of morals are literally killing people. I am not submissive in all relationships Men mistake my being that way for weakness..unless they are in the lifestyle..but even then I dont seem to fit because most Doms ,if you will, are looking for a D/s sexual relationship only..most married..That is what led me to taken in hand. That is why I posted my very 1st post here..hoping to find someone to talk to about where I'm at with it all. As for your observation on bettygirl and me not referring to myself as bettywoman is interesting..Dont read into everything in life so much its exhausting if not to you certainly to others..It's a nickname I've had for 30 years it came from a bad haircut and perm "BETTYBOOP" since my perm and hair grew out it turned to "Bettygirl" I'm a 45 year old women now and it is still a term of indearment by all my family and friends.

Applauding the comments of SameDifference !

In response to Flower's opinion:<br />
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It seems that you haven't considered that perhaps these women are meeting a need they feel they have. <br />
You said that you hope Betty gains happiness "this way" instead of avoiding "real" happiness through spiritual growth. This infers that you are the arbiter of what "real" happiness is and simultaneously you belittle the path these women have taken to understand themselves and fill a need and gain any spiritual growth they might get from it.<br />
One of the most important things I have learned in trying to understand myself and other people is the very important precept that all perceptions are a gamble. Keeping this in mind has made my life a lot easier and much more amusing; it has also had the added side effect of making it difficult to stay mad at anyone for long.<br />
I find it slightly worrisome that you are attempting to diagnose people as sex addicts. You are not a therapist...are you?<br />
If someone likes sex a lot that does not mean they are a sex addict. It means they are a human and enjoy the full faculties of their body to use as they see fit. This is but one aspect of the human experience. It looks as if Betty and Sapphire are both women who are well past being "thrust into an adult role for the first time". Why do you assume that is not the case? If at this point in their lives they are not used to being an adult I would say that their problem lies a lot deeper than any sexual role play they may engage in privately.<br />
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Also I think the fact that you have a hard time typing out the words "sex", "castrate", and "genitalia" may say something about your own personal development.

I really like what you said bout all perceptions being a gamble! I agree wholeheartedly.

LOL ! Flowers, in any relationship there can be an imbalance. I am not advocating my choice for anyone else, male of female. I have no desire to encourage anyone to embrace male domination of the world or Islam or any religion. You have mistaken my disagreement with your position as being defensive. I have no agenda to convert anyone. The only 12 step program I may need is one to help me with chocolate withdrawals.<br />
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My initial reply was simply to support Betty in her choice. I would also support your choice to believe as you like. It would be nice if you could be considerate & respectful of others choices as well. I do not want to hijack Betty's post with this debate. Perhaps you should post a story of your own if you would like to continue such a discussion.

I strongly disagree with Flowers comments. I am new to the submissive lifestyle myself. It has nothing to do with my religious beliefs. The fact I enjoy being submissive to my man does not indicate any immaturity or weakness on my part. I am very much capable of supporting myself financially and taking care of my own needs. It is because I know myself so well and am so comfortable with myself that I have chosen this for myself. I am very happy with my man as my Master. Our relationship is founded on mutual agreement. We are committed to it and I consider it to be very healthy. There are no secrets and we are very open with one another.<br />
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We are all entitled to our own opinions. Personally, I found your comparison to female castration to be appalling.