Come-uppance For The Macho Man!

In summer I noticed the back gate needed painting, so I mentioned this to my Lord and Master, hinting that I would be prepared to do the job. I figured it would be therapeutic, and a nice way of getting out of doing something else, (which I never want to do). My man, being as usual, one step ahead of me said that no, it would not be necessary for me to paint the gate; he himself would do it and I could get on with doing the thing I was supposed to but didn't want to. The implication was that painting gates is a job for a man, and most certainly not for a woman whose coordination cannot be relied on.

Some weeks later, when the first hint of autumn was promising to bugger up our driveway with fallen leaves, and the gate had still not been painted, I bravely mentioned it again. "I'll do it when I get around to it," he said grandly. "I'm the one that takes the bins out so don't bother yourself with it. Leave it to me."

Yesterday we had some friends over for supper - some to stay the night. My man was in fine fettle, opening tightly capped jars with ease, yanking corks out of bottles and generally being macho. He even pulled the screw cap off the fifth bottle, using the Lazy Fish. The 'piece of resistance' occurred around 1 a.m. when there was an uncharacteristic hullaballoo going on outside. Why a party of rowdies chose to stop outside our house when they began shouting and swearing I don't know - it has never happened before. But it went on for at least five minutes before my husband decided he ought to do something about it. I won't say we were all completely aristotled by this time - but that's only my opinion. If I'd been able to find my shoes I could still have walked in high heels. Between them the men decided that it would be safer for us women if they didn't go out the front door, but went out the back entrance which is hidden from the road by trees. Having worked themselves up into a state of indignation against the rowdies they flexed their biceps and rolled their sleeves up. They went out there like Rambo 1 and 2. Their exhalations hung in the cold air.

But they couldn't get the gate open. Oh god how I laughed
damselfly damselfly
56-60, F
3 Responses Jan 12, 2013

it doesn't get better than this!

Ha ha ha!!! Typical male behaviour. My husband has a lot of anecdotes such as this.

"But they couldn't get the gate open". LMAO!!!!!!!!