All I Do Is Wait For You

you can't deny that there's something wrong between us. it's been what, half a year, since we had a decent conversation? i don't even know. all i know is now, things are different for me in regards to you. i love you, but not the way that you seem to love me. i am not in love with you. i love you like i love all my friends. i can't be treated like your girlfriend and be expected to respond in that way. what do you want from me? do you want me to leave you alone? i've tried so many things. this is the hardest friendship that i ever had to keep. you make it so difficult to love you, to be there, to be your friend. i love you, is that not enough between friends? i can't be the one you come to when you're in the shithole and then be tossed when you're better. i'm tired of being that person. you're never there for me. can't you just let me in? let me into that dark place of yours that even you don't understand fully. i feel like you're crying out to me sometimes. if i leave you, who will you have left? you will stick by you like i have? no one. everyone leaves you or you leave them. no one has been able to withstand all the torments that you put yourself through and put them through. i am not your exgirlfriend. i am not her. i won't hurt you like she did. i am not in a relationship with you in that manner. i am your friend. let me just be your friend. nothing more, nothing less.
namehere namehere
22-25, F
2 Responses Sep 21, 2006

I have to agree and I know I have been guilty of punishing people I care about for what others have done to me in the past.. it's not healthy and I am trying to stop but sometimes it happens before I realise and then I can't take it back

I can relate. Just reading this frustrates me. We are patient and giving. Unfortunately, many of us get punished because another woman made mistakes. I'm glad I found this site, I can finally vent in peace.