Born Without Ovaries - Ivf And Donor Egg My Only Option.....

When I was around 17, and hadn’t started puberty my parents & doctor decided to investigate - after many months of numerous blood tests (so many I got used to the light-headed feeling), they decided that I had a slight form of Turners syndrome (more on this in a bit), which means that right at the moment of conception, one of my x chromosomes got damaged, and the piece that was lost was the bit that should’ve told my body to grow ovaries - I was born without, and although my tubes and uterus/womb are 100% normal, I would have to be on HRT for the rest of my life and would need a donor egg and IVF to have a child. At the age of 17, this was still devastating, as I had always just thought I would automatically be a mom one day.  Over the years I did further research and in general the medical profession have been good to me, but this is something I have always had to deal with in my own way.  As I moved past my mid 20's, time seemed to be running out, but I hadn’t met the right man, nor did I have the money for IVF, so I coped with it day to day.

Fast forward to my mid 30's - I have now met the man I want to have kids with, and who will be such a good father, and whose clock is ticking as much as mine is.  We don’t have the money, but could get it.  Living in our area of London, we are on the waiting list and will be able to get 1 cycle of IVF for free on the NHS.  Unfortunately the wait for a donor egg could be forever unless we find someone - which would mean friends or family, or advertising....which in reality is probably not going to happen.  We are both from South Africa - have both been in the UK for 10 and 11 years, together for just over 2 years - so have investigated our options there, so will need at least £5k per cycle - so as you can understand the financial commitment is quite a bit.

We have some wonderful friends who want to help, but she is over the age limit (and had premature twin girls, so wouldn’t put her through any risk).  Most of our friends have kids, as we're at that age group, and most have varying knowledge of my situation - we enjoy time with them and their children.  Some days are more difficult emotionally, and I decide whether I can handle it or not. Some I don’t go to, some I go, and then deal with the emotional fallout afterwards.

What is Turners syndrome - well as I mentioned its where there are no ovaries at all, or some streaks of tissues (in my case), so there is no natural hormones, so HRT is needed permanently.  There are other health issues normally, some heart problems, some ear and eye issues, but sometimes there are also physical characteristics which I am lucky enough not to have - Turner syndrome girls are usually shorter than 5ft, and some have webbing between fingers and toes, and some webbing between neck and shoulders.  So as I said in my case I have been extremely lucky.

Each day is a struggle - I joined EP in the hopes of meeting others like me, kind of like an online support community as the infertility is really starting to affect me - not sure if it’s because I’m turning 36 this year, and don’t feel like I’m any closer to at least starting my IVF journey let alone getting to achieve my dream.  I hope that in turn I can help someone else to understand.
sascorpio sascorpio
41-45, F
3 Responses Aug 7, 2010

i was born without ovaries and a uterus. as growing up, i was always told that i could not have children. i dont even have cycles and yes i do believe that i cant have children. im only 19 years old right now, but sooner or later in life i would want to have my own some day. when i think about it i get sad sometimes, but i know i have an option of adopting.. the IVF you were talking about, they actually make that as if you can produce and have your own?

When I was 18 (1981), I, too, had not started my periods and soon after discovered I did not have ovaries. Doctors did not know where I was producing enough estrogen to make me look female. I was rail thin and 5'9" and can't understand finding it's a form of Turner's Syndrome how that is possible. I do not have any other the other conditions of the syndrome, other than doing math in my head is difficult. Always wondered if there were other woman like me.

My daughter will be 17 in Oct. She has not started and we just found out a few weeks ago that she has no ovaries and her uterus is very small. She is healthy and a tall 5ft.7in. and still growing. The doctor's have no explaination as to why other than they just did't develope. I have never done drugs! Never! we are heartbroken. I just wanted you to know you are not alone. My daughter is on here, Britt33, im sure she would love to chat with you b/c she is like you, she wants to know she not alone and have people to talk to that can understand how she feels. Just know that you guys can be mommy's, it takes more than just being able to make babies to be mommy's and daddy's. Bless your heart. :) Hope to hear from you.

Isn't is a cruel joke that because we do not have ovaries, we still can't escape having a period through HPT?? I never thought to look up if other women had the same condition until today. I guess it's because I never thought of having children and having to research my options. Glad to find there are more of us out there.