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A 'Straight' Lesbian? (I Really Dislike Labels)

I am a woman who recently fell in love with a very close male friend of mine that happens to crossdress. We have SO much in common and he's definitely my favorite person on the planet to spend time with. Since I have only ever been in traditional heterosexual relationships, I told myself that CDing just "wasn't my thing" and that I couldn't be attracted to a man in women's clothing. I completely dismissed the idea of a sexual relationship with him when I first met him.

I am a very open-minded person and studied sexuality and gender identity in college, but I still thought that I only could be with a "manly man" romantically. I told him that we could only be friends because I just didn't find the CD thing sexually appealing. Fortunately, we started spending a lot of time together and I found myself falling in love with him. (He says that he fell in love with me the first night we met.) :) It's only been about 2 weeks since our relationship turned romantic and I joined this site to try to open my mind up further and learn more about the psychological and emotional pieces that surround crossdressing in heterosexual men.

I am still not 100% "comfortable" with the idea of being with such a feminine man, but I REALLY want to learn to be. I have never felt a love like this before and I am hoping that this site will help me let go of all the social brainwashing that I've received all these years so I can give him all of the love that I can...

I think it's a good sign that I already find him sexy in satin... ;)
sweetone23 sweetone23 31-35, F 12 Responses Dec 5, 2012

Your Response


Know you know there is brain washing it's not just how we free but how we are taught to believe
never follow blindly

Your statement of social brainwashing is spot on. Go with what you you feel is right.

I do hope your relationship is working out well, and that you are feeling comfortable with the feminine side of your man. It's interesting to me to hear from women who thought they could only love a "manly" man, who then fall in love with a guy who has a feminine side and a thing for dressing up. When you truly love someone, the clothes really don't make that much of a difference. Thanks for sharing your story!

Since I suppose he doesn't go to work crossdressed, then his personal preference to do so in private with you is his way to be whole and cope with his dissociative identity. This is healthy for him since otherwise would invoke repression leading to a timebomb and come out out of control at some point. Nobody is perfect, and you accepting this condition is similar to accepting other weaknesses in either one. Think of it as role playing for fun, and for the love you have.

I love your story and profile, please add me :)

Your story is so inspirational. I live in northern California. I would absolutely LOVE to find a woman to be a life long partner who knows and encourages, assists me in dressing like a woman. I am 100% male M-F from 7am to 6pm. I would be happy to do the house work and maintenance. Then after that if its OK with my partner I can dress up and just hang around or be he "lesbian" lover. I can dream...

Would you elaborate for all of us who are looking for this type of women?
How to search for this type of female on line, what type of person should we be looking for etc.
I'm sure that their are women out there, but us cross dressers don't know how to politely ask if they would like to hang out with us. Maybe just as friends only.

You have come to the right place darling

I just wish there were more women like you.

Thats great, I wish more lesbian or bi girls would try to find out more about us. We are just a girl at heart and we know how a girl feels and wants to be loved.

Fabulous sweetie

Glad you are open minded enough not to dismiss your feelings for your new guy just because he is a crossdresser. Women like yourself are rare, and I am glad you are surfing the net looking for information.