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Funeral

I've decided to attend my own funeral.....I want to know what everyone has to say about me when I'm gone....You know, all those things you don't hear when you're alive......I plan to haunt anyone who says bad things.....Lol
Brunhild Brunhild 36-40, F 8 Responses Oct 25, 2011

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Jesus loves you. You never come back as a ghost, darling. When you're gone, that's it. Jesus loves you. Please don't give up. If you don't have something or someone to live for, find something, please. I love you so much. God bless and help you<3

Sorry I'm late in answering . . . <br />
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I meet a lot of discouraged people here on EP. But wait, but then I am also lonely and discouraged - often.<br />
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I also resist the temptation to give people pep talks -- "Come on girl, shape up! You're still young and you have your whole life ahead you." Uh-uh, I won't do that. That positive thinking nonsense is like a gentle rain on a hot sidewalk that quickly evaporates and is gone. But I do comisserate (spelling?) , and I gently try to help people see that they have value - and potential - because they do..<br />
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life is fickle ... last year this time I was raking down 75K a year, now I am collecting unemployment. I sold my two story colonial in the summer and am living in a rented trailer in a mobile home park. According to my calculations, I shall be dead broke in August. Now, by the world's standards, I'm about two ticks above a street bum. But I'm not, I have value, I just don't have a job at the moment, and that's the difference. But, I've been here before, and eventually, like a cat that gets swatted off the table, I always land on my feet. <br />
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You are a mother, the most important job in the world. Do you know that Mother Theresa died the same day as Princess Di ... and who you think got all the press ? Di's life was tragic, she was young and years ahead of her. Theresa served the poor her whole life and got a bi-line a few days later. <br />
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Hug those babies for me.<br />
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Monique

I have recently learned from a few people how valuable I am.......It's hard to believe people could see me in such a great light, but it's nice to hear.......It does good for my self esteem :-).......I appreciate your wisdom and comments......I recently asked my 14yr old daughter what she thought of me as a person and she immediately rattled off these qualities and things I had no idea she saw.......She said, "Your love is unending...." among others......I felt like crying because I didn't think I made such an impression on my daughter.......So I guess my legacy will be a good one after all.......:-)

I'm getting a little teary here myself . . . Raising children is an all consuming job . . . I have a story here on EP called "The Summer of My Discontent," which tells about me at 14 and how was i sent to my Aunt and Uncle's for the summer, which almost forced my mother into early parental retirement. But if you have a daughter who will talk that openly and honestly, i would consider myself very fortunate, and feel glad that the love you have invested in her is coming back to you .. and others.. Monique

Remember what Clarence (Angel second class) said, "No man (or woman) will ever be poor so long as he or she has friends." You have no idea how we are connected to other people. I think the famous surgeon (can't think of his name) said, "we are all connected by a thousand invisible threads." where daily we are lashing new threads to all kinds of people in our every day life, meeting new people, deepeening other relationships .. we're not even aware of it . . .that's why it just isn't that easy to drop out and leave all those threads dangling . . know what I mean? They're going to miss you even it's the guy at the 7-11 where you buy your coffee...<br />
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But the world's value system will always be warped. The world values beauty, brains, talent, money . . and if you think you're shorted in those things, that's when feelings of worthless comes in to play. After I recovered from a terrible depression, I got a job for an auto parts store driving a delivery truck. Here I was a wife of university prof with a degree, but you know what, I felt more valuable driving that truck than I ever did going to parties and playing a role and trying meet an expectation that I could never meet ... <br />
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xoxo<br />
Monique

I don't nor have I ever had those opportunities......I don't have a college and I can't get a job that pays more than $9:50.......I have children.....Two of which are still babies........

from your quote . . .<br />
"I just want to know what kind of difference I made in their lives if any.." yes, that sort of is the Wonderful Life theme . . George Bailey gets to see what would have happened to Bedford Falls had he not been there .. and Donna Reed would have become a spinster librarian .. a real waste . . it seems a lot of the funerals I go to lately often have people speak about the life .. others are truly sad and well . . he's gone and that's that . . . <br />
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but onto happier things . . we can still grow, and change .. and we have a lot to offer people as we grow older becuase we have suffered and learned from life .. to pass along learning to others is very satisfying . . then you don't feel your suffering is in vain . . . I don't have grand children but I have a nephew and niece and I suddenly have discovered that being a helping and nurturng auntie is quite cool ... more later ...<br />
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Monique

Thank-you......That gives me a lot to think about......I always liked that movie too.....Maybe that's why I want to know........When you grow up being told you're worthless, you just wonder......Or at least I do......

not to be funny, but you might try writing your obituary ... don't laugh, talk about your life and what you did . . I plan to pay for extra space to tell all about my life, my joys, my sorrows, my regrets of things I wish I had done . . strangely I have come through hard times and done some pretty good things and there are things I still want to do . . . <br />
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but I am through worrying about what other people say about me .. I am sort of a nut at times but what is important is .. I am growing, I am learning (though painful) I am changing and thus becoming more confident about who I am . . . <br />
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We're getting close to Christmas ... It's a Wonderful Life will be on where we learn that "No man will ever be poor so long as he has friends" - so to hell with the rest of them - useless whiners ..<br />
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Happy Thanksgiving..<br />
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Monique

That is a good point.....I'm not really worried about what they'll say, I just want to know what kind of difference I made in their lives if any.....I've just always been a curious person.....I am going to write out a will though.....Thanks for your comment.....:)

You make a lot of difference in my life. You have become one of the best friends I will ever have.............

I can't even think of that! You are going to live, and help with your grandchildren. You are just to good a person for me to think that way. Your little ones need you and I know how much you love all of your children. I pray you will have the strength you need to continue on the path you must travel, just know that God loves you and he is always "carrying you" when you don't feel like you can make it. also, you DO have friends on here that CARE and think highly of you. <br />
Kim

Well, I didn't say tomarrow.....But I still plan to....:D You don't have to worry about that right now....

I would flip out if you dropped dead, have a tantrum and say, ... "there goes my only contact, back to the drawling board" and then scream ... it's like I'm in space so no one can hear it lol so I can afford to do that. :p

Hahahahahahahahahahaha......Well at least EP wouldn't know I was dead.....Plus I'd have to figure out a way to type.....LOL

I have often wonder why people do that, tell me while I can still see and hear you... Thanks for saying what many what to and don't....<br />
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Love you & miss you <br />
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~~Lady B~~~ (only you know my real name)

Hahahahahaha......I have no couth....LOL My own mom said it.......Like Matt and I say, I have no filter.....:)