My Purpose

Heey im trying to message you but it wont let me (:

Sounds like a lot of my life really. I'm not agoraphobic but I've been so busy for so much of my life it's hard to relate to people. Folks I knew are now grandparents for crying out loud!

I tried to find you on Facebook by your name and location, but the person I found didn't look anything like you. (check your email)

Awww babe :( We were just texting, i thought something was up and now I know :( I can't say anything that will make this all go away. But You are loved and you will fight through the agoraphobia, I know this, you are the strongest person I have ever met!!!!! It may be one month or a few years from now, but I know you will work through this, no matter what the time frame is, you've come so far!!!!! You don't see it, but you have, what you're dealing with...is a constant battle. And there will be ****** days, but you'll fight through it like you are now. I know what you're saying, and I know I cannot relate 100 percent, but I can relate and what you're feeling right now... Will go away. . Just don't give up and don't think of yourself in the light that you are, you are a beautiful person, and so smart and awesome and I hope one day even if it's not til I'm like in my thirties :P, I'd like to meet you, meet this strong person who I speak to that gives me hope and strength. Even when we don't speak, you give me that. Seeing you and knowing that you fight daily, gives me hope, makes me want to fight. And the down days will happen, I had one the other night, and to be completely honest, I wanted to die, i haven't fallen that low in awhile and it scared me and I was hurting. I imagine that is some of what you're feeling now, the fear the depression and probably ten times more than I can imagine.
One thing I want to say to you is, is that you will see wonderful things the more you fight through this, you will find more friends, and see them get married and see their kids grow. but if some of these people can't make the effort to see you ever, then they aren't worth your time. Fact is, you're dealing with a lot of horrible stuff and I can't begin to imagine the pain you're feeling. But you need strong people in your life. People who understand and will stick by you. Some of these people may in time prove to be just that for you and not know what to do at the moment. But again, just remember what you're fighting for. Right now it may seem like nothing because you're hurting, and believe me I can understand the pain. But this will fade, and you'll be back to normal in time. But venting, expressing this.... just shows me once again how strong you are. You're letting it out, you're reaching out. You may feel alone in this at home, but you have so many here that love and care for you, and that includes me :-) Also, as for family and such on facebook, if they can't be bothered to keep in contact with you on there...**** em. They clearly do not get what agoraphobia, depression, and anxiety can do to a person, otherwise....they would have tried other ways to stay in contact. And if people don't understand what you're dealing with, even on a small level, then they don't deserve to have you in their lives. I've known you long enough to see ups and downs,but you always pull through, it takes time and effort, but you can do it!! You can do anything you set your mind to!!! Just requires patience. And I'm thrilled to be able to call you my friend now and the day that you are able to pull through even more of your issues I'll feel the same, you'll just be showing everyone how strong you are. I'm proud of you now. And the further you fight this, I'll just be more proud. I love ya chick, and even with all this ****** up **** going on... Remember who you are. And I'm always here, an email or text or call away and I mean that. *hugs*