Kindness May Be Of More Value

 "The truth hurts" or is it the "The truth heals?"  The challenge in telling the truth; you may hurt a friend or don't tell the truth; and it drives an invisible wall between you.  When you tell lies, even little bitty white lies, it can be hard to remember who you told what too.   Being honest means you need to be tactful, saying things honestly but nicely, it also means not keeping things hidden, that would be creating dishonesty.

A study completed by a team of psychologists in Chicago found that men felt honesty is crucial for a relationship, were women rarely do.  This phenomenon is due to “selective remembering;” he remembers the games he won, not the games he lost, when to change the oil, not his girl-friend's birthday.   "In the province of the mind, what one believes to be true either is true or becomes true."(John Lilly)

Should you be honest about your feelings? Yes . but. Let's say your man wants sex and you don't. It's one thing to say, "I don't feel like it now. I had a terrible day at work," and even possible to say, "Not until you've taken a shower and put on some deodorant." But to say, "No, you're the worst lover I've ever had, and like you were saying about your ex-wife the other night ." That sort of "honesty" is inexcusable, and, if not true, soon will be.

i find it hard to tell the truth when it will hurt someones feelings.  The Czechs have a saying:  "Better a lie that heals than a truth that wounds."  So what about “total honesty”?   Kindness may be of more value.

mollydd mollydd
Mar 16, 2010