I Wonder Why My Dad...

I was born with a silver spoon. We were a happy family before. I always get what I want whenever I want them. Life was perfect, there was nothing more I could ask. It was perfectly perfect.

Me, my dad, my mom, my sister and my half-brother - we were happy.

But then, the perfectness was gone.

~ELEMENTARY GRADUATION~
During my elementary graduation, my dad wasn't there as he promised me. My mom said he couldn't come to the country because of work(my dad works in a different country) and then she promised he would be there during my High School Graduation and this summer.

~SUMMER~
(in case you are all wondering, summer vacation/break is on April and May in my country)
April..

May..

It's almost June, and he hasn't come home yet. May is the usual month when he comes to visit, because it's summer and we don't have a class. It's the perfect family-bonding time. But he didn't came.

~FRESHMEN and SOPHOMORE YEAR~
It's been three years and my dad hasn't come home yet. I guess I'm used to the idea of him not being around.

~JUNIOR YEAR~
My mom called me and asked if she can use my e-mail account(because she doesn't have one) because a lawyer was going to send her some files. She also asked me if I could print it myself, I said yes.

A few minutes later, I got the e-mail. I saved it on my laptop and printed it out. I was wondering what was that papers about but then I didn't look. I had a feeling that I shouldn't read it.

My mom came, and asked if she could see the file and check if it was right. So I showed it to her, accidentally I read it and it says something about "ANNULMENT OF MARRIAGE". I was shocked. I couldn't believe what I just read. My mom and dad are breaking up without even telling us.

I was in great shock, suddenly I felt tears running down my eyes. I excused myself and told her I was sleepy. I went to my room, which me and my little sister share. I don't want her seeing me cry. Luckily, she was already asleep when I came in. I did some homeworks and then talked to someone about it. He comforted me, his words comforted me.

Months passed, I tried my best to gain a communication with my father again. I miss him so much already. I looked through Facebook and found him there(thank you Facebook <3 i love you so much. Because of you, i found my father again). I added him immediately as a friend. Days passed and he accepted his request, I looked through his profile and noticed he was new. I immediately sent him a message asking him how he is and then he said fine. I asked more, but he didn't reply back.

Christmas came, and I sent my dad another message. I told him Merry Christmas and then he replied back saying Merry Christmas to me too. I told him I miss him and I would love to see him again. But then, his answers weren't the answers I expected from a father....it's kind of long but in short he said, I am only your father biologically so please don't bother me with my life again. I was shocked, tears fell through my eyes again and contacted my someone again he comforted me.

It wasn't what I expected. I expected he would say 'I miss you too darling, sorry I wasn't there for you. But I promise to make it all up soon'. He didn't say those words. I know he didn't say he hates me or something but his words hurts a lot. I never contacted him again eventhough I want to.


This coming June, I'm gonna be a Senior and I'm gonna be graduating next year, March 2012. I want my dad to be there. I want everyone that I love to be there. My classmates' and schoolmates' family are gonna be there except for mine.

I love and miss my dad so much A lot of things had changed since he left. My mom..I feel like she doesn't care about me now..My brother and sister, I feel like they don't care about me...Everyone in my family..



PS.12.43am while I was writing this. I'm having some emotionally stress right now so sorry if you don't understand a word or anything of what I just wrote. I just need to get this off my chest. And also, I suck at writing or even at talking So please just understand me.

If you read it all the way down here, then "I LOVE YOU!!"
xoxoxo
iHatshepsut iHatshepsut
22-25, F
1 Response May 13, 2011

thanks :D