What's Going On?

Here's what happened at work today:

A woman came in and asked for a puncture repair kit.  Feeling cheeky I asked her if it was for her Antonio Banderas blow up doll?  She replied "I don't know what make of bike it is, I just know it has a puncture..."  I mean, the Antonio Banderas 21 speed mountain bike??  I don't think so.  Talk about over her head...

Then a guy asked for some sticky tape.  I asked him what kind of tape so that I could choose the right one for him.  With greatly exaggerated patience, he explained it very clearly to me "I want it sticky on one side..... and not sticky on the other side..."  Yes indeed I am a moron and I ask pointless questions for no reason.  I grabbed the nearest tape, passed it to him and just walked away leaving him to it.

Then we had a guy who asked for some forceps.  My colleague, who is a woman, passed him the forceps.  "I want them for fishing" he informed her "...I'm not a gynecologist!".  No... she didn't think you were, you weirdo.

Then I helped a transvestite.  He had the full works.  Wig, dress, high heels, gravelly voice, shovel hands, five o'clock shadow...  I mean, I have absolutely no problem with transvestites whatsoever.  I admire them because, for want of a better term, it takes balls to dress like that in public.  I just think that if you look like a cross between Benny Hill and Andre the Giant,  there may be better choices than transvestism.  Road worker, pro wrestler, nightclub doorman... but not cross dressing.

Just to top the day off we had then one thing I really did not expect.  Three overweight, middle aged Elvis impersonators.  Jump suits?  Check.  Sparkly sunglasses?  Check.  Coiffed hair?  Check.  Any comprehension of how ridiculous they looked?  Nope!

This is one day in my job.  Sometimes I love it.  Mostly I don't....

Pricey Pricey
26-30, M
25 Responses Aug 23, 2008

wao your job is not boring-keep on writing the stories and and make some people laugh

You have to do it too? Well in that case I am sorry for you also :(

You really do have to work this kind of job to understand. I hate my job most of the time too. I can so relate, I'm sorry.

do you work in vegas by any chance?

Ghost busters? lol!! I would have liked to see those.

hahah This sounds about right for retail. I saw two ghost busters the other day!

ROL...that sooooo funny........when I was doing credit relief for a Gov department I had some funny clients....<br />
One guy told us that he was selling his hydroponic set ( grew good quality mull)up so he could get his car out of the repossession yard..<br />
I was speaking to what I thought was a female client and when I finished the call i said good bye Mrs..... and he said I am a man not a lady ...its my voice <br />
it made the time go by at least.

That would be good. I have guinea pigs, would that work?

Disposing of customers bodies is one of my regular daydreams. Oh, and the most inventive ways to do them in! That's always fun.

If you think that's rude you should meet our real assy customers. I do the finger gun thing behind their head usually.

Ha ha the novelty does fade, yes. I'm not sure if it's funny any more or just tragic!

Your customer base sounds livlier than the one I used to deal with. After a while, though, I'd imagine the novelty tends to fade.

LOL - you got any jobs going I could use a laugh! :)

No, that's a clothes shop!!

I believe the plural is Elvii...

We did. How weird is that?!

Oh! Thanks for the update!

I'll pm you love

Okay, now you two have totally lost me --- :(

Ketamine? Bloody hell. Sounds like MY brother!<br />
<br />
I live on the Cornish riviera you know! Lol

Are you sure you don't live in Vegas?!

Yeah I will swap, but you know I have issues with little people!<br />
<br />
Why would I make this up? It's a bit more than usual, but this stuff is an everyday occurence at my work. We get all the crazies!

You are SO making all this up!!!!

Who wants my job? Please take it... I need a break

Wasted on her Sleepless, completely wasted :(