I Worry Till It Drives Me Crazy.....

I have huge habit of worrying, to the point where it drives me insanely crazy, but it effects my emotional state not my physical state. I have the tendency to worry about everything from the moment I wake up till the moment I go back to sleep.
If I had to write a essay about my worrying I think I would be able to write more then 50 pages long or more, but I am not going to write it so long here. The worries that occure the most for me are to do with my boyfriend, and I think it to do with how much I love him, he is literally my everything, I really love him so much.
So I guess that is why I worry so much about him meeting someone else and leaving me for her or that he will leave me another way early. I worry alot when it come to my boyfriend, I always end thinking negative thoughts, I wonder if I am good enough for him, if I am attractive anought for him, If I am good or bad Girlfriend. My insercurties do take over me and I worry a awful alot when it comes to him. 

I also have a tendency to worry about what people think of me, what people think of my family etc if they like me or hate, if I am too loud or too quiet, just basically if I am liked or disliked. I am not very confident with myself so it come to a point where it drives me insanely crazy emotionally, even to the point of tears. Because When I think of it, it hurts me deelpy and I try get over it, but it still lingers in the back of my mind till it wants to strike again and then I worry if I don't worry it will happen. So I get myself all upset and again. I honestly wish I would just stop worrying, but I feel as if I don't it would happen and I don't want it too. I really wish I wasn't like this at all, when ever I do I feel guilty of worrying about some of the things and it starts to make wonder if I am better off six feet under, if that was to happen maybe I boyfriend  and everyone else would be better off without me.....
CagallinaRosetteZala CagallinaRosetteZala
22-25, F
Aug 8, 2010