I've Decided to Effin Stop.

My mom left hours ago and told me she'd be home shortly, she was going down the road to drop off my broither at the skating rink. 

Well, hours passed.  It's raining cats and dogs.  I got worried.  Very very worried.  Because she didn't text me, and it got dark, the rain continued to pour.  Usually she texts me if she does something unexpected.

Her and her bf just walked in, she's drunk.

I hate my life sometimes.  Absolutely despise.

urbrandofheroin urbrandofheroin
22-25, F
9 Responses Mar 14, 2009

It sounds like you have some goals.....one day you will look back on your childhood, and realize that you "launched" yourself...it will be something to be proud of....although if you're like me, maybe there will be a little sadness to it. So you go onward, have your own family...and make damn sure you don't repeat the mistakes your parent's have....that's easier said then done because we learn through our roll models...you'll be awesome! Now help me figure my crap out....because all the years I've known all this I still am a little powerless to change sometimes...

I am 19. Right now I am taking a course to become a bridal consultant. I graduated two years ago from high school but my father's girlfriend decided she didn't want the babies anymore and she gave them to me. I had them six months, and I developed agoraphobia from being stuck in the house all those months every single day.<br />
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After the kids finally left, I had a hard time going anywhere at all, I'm just now getting better and am ready to get a job. I am happy to be training to become a bridal consultant because it is somethhing I am passionate about.<br />
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I have someone in my life, that really helps, but they live far away so we can't be physically together and sometimes I just need a hug.

Ok so you have a really rough time..how old are you?....can you try and focus on doing things you want to do....maybe decide a career path...focus on what it is you really like to do, and absorb yourself in it....is this an option? It's really tough to look around and feel that there is no one there for you...it's usually at these moments that someone or something comes into your life, and gives it renewed meaning. I am wating patiently for that to happen to me...so far it hasn't

Unfortunately my dad is not around, he is a joke. He has three young children with his girlfriend and I've had to take alot of responsibilty in raising them so far too.

Something to remember, eventually it'll be your turn and you'll be responsible for yourself and maybe a child. Is your Dad around? I had to mostly raise myself, my family broke apart when I was 4......so you aren't alone, find what it is you love to do and do it....anything you want is possible......just focus on the positives..it's what gets me by day to day

The sad part is, my mom was 15 when she had me. My whole life she has been lviing out her youth. It's like I've been raised by a big sister, and at times, raising her myself.

Young Lady, it is unfortunate that you have to see these things, I would guess your mom is trying to relive part of her youth....and that means overdoing it. You maybe could ask her gently, "mom how would you feel if I was out in the pouring rain, didn't call you and came home drunk,".....I hope I could lend you some support.....

She hasnt done something liek this in awhile so I'm kinda shocked. But I'm more pissed off.

this is really not a good thing for you to see!