Not Sure...

I'm not sure what the intent behind this group was.
I may have read the name in quite the wrong way. If so, I apologise to the creator and don't mind if you want to purge my drivel but...

Yes, I would give you my clothes.

I love being naked. I love getting naked. I love being outdoors naked where there is a risk of being seen. I love walking around outdoors naked and being far from my clothes.

I see two scenarios which fit the name of the group if not it's spirit.

The first:

We're out walking. Doesn't matter where... the woods.. the beach.. the open countryside.. the middle of a shopping centre..
You turn to me and say: "Give me your clothes."

"Pardon," I say.

"You heard me, give me your clothes."

"What? Here? Now? But I can't just..."

"NOW. Give me your clothes. Now!"

"Err.. OK..."

I begin to *****. Shoes first, then socks. I pick them up and hand them over to you. I look straight into your eyes, trying to determine some hint of a joke or a 'gotcha!' coming, but nothing. You are mildly amused but deadly serious.

"Come on, what are you waiting for? Get 'em off and hand 'em over."

"Are you sure about..."

"Look. You said you'd do this for me. Now do it. Get your clothes off and give them to me."

The sweatshirt comes off over my head and joins my shoes and socks in the plastic bag you've somehow conjured up from somewhere.

As does the t-shirt.

The belt comes loose and the trousers are slid down and off. They follow the rest of my clothes into your bag.

One last look at your face and a last hope for reprieve flickers out.

"Look. You aren't getting these back," you say holding the bag up and shaking it, "so, unless you want to make your own way back home in just your underpants, I suggest you get those off as well."

So off they come and I hand them over to you.

"Finally" you say, more to yourself than to me, and they go in the bag too. "Now. Where are you taking me for lunch?"

I'm kind of dumbstruck at the moment. I'm standing here, naked, having just given you all my clothes simply because you asked for them.

I watch as you start to walk off, humming to yourself and swinging the bag to and fro. Then, after a few paces, you suddenly turn as if you'd just spotted something out of the corner of your eye.

You had. You take a few steps to your left and innocently throw the bag into a rubbish bin.

"Well?.. aren't you coming?..." you smile as you've noticed I haven't followed. "Come on. I fancy italian for lunch. Let's go to that little place..............."

The second:

"All-right, sweetie. Today's the day."

"Eh? What? What day?"

You look a little peeved.

"Don't tell me you've forgotten!"


"You have! You've forgotten what you said you'd do today!"

"I'm sorry, darling. Yes. I have forgotten. What was it that I said I'd do today?"

Now you're pouting. You don't do that. It's unnerving. You're not a giggling little girl, you're a full-grown, confident woman. You only pout when you know you've got the upper hand and you want to have some fun.

Like a cat toys with a mouse.

"Remember last week? Over at Lynda and Simon's place?"


"We were talking about trust and commitment."


"Yes. 'Oh'. Coming back to you now, is it?"


"Oh, do stop 'umm'ing and 'err'ing at me. Did you mean what you said or not?"

"You know I did."

"Do you remember your vow?"


"Do you remember your exact words?"

"Yes. I think so... it went something like...."

"You don't need to try and remember them. You wrote them down, didn't you?"

"Yes, 'we' did write them down."

"Okay, 'we' wrote them down. But you were fully in agreement with the final wording and you signed it fully sober and un-coerced, didn't you?"

"Yes. I did. But so did Simon... he also...."

"Yes, yes. So did Simon. I'm sure Lynda will see that he keeps his promise too. My only concern is to make sure you keep yours."

"Okay, okay. But... I mean... "

"You're not backing out."

It was not a question.

"No. I'm not backing out. I'm not saying that what I said and signed wasn't exactly what I meant and would not hesitate to do. But..."

"But what?"

"Well... I mean... "


"Well... I'm just thinking of the practicalities. That's all."

"You let me worry about the practicalities. You just worry about keeping to your agreement."

"Okay. You win."

"NO! We BOTH win out of this. You get to demonstrate just how much you love me and how strong your character and your word is. I get to revel in how much you love me."


"It's a 'woman' thing. Don't try to understand it."

"Oh. A 'woman' thing."

"Okay, okay. So I get to fulfil a fantasy as well. But that's secondary. My main prize is knowing that a big, strong brute like you loves me so much he is willing to..."

"Okay! Okay, okay... I get it!"

"Good boy."

"So... when do you want to do this, then?"

"Right now."

"Right now?"

"You heard me. Right now."

"And how do we...."

"I've got everything ready down here. Half a dozen storage boxes and four large holdalls. All you need to do is stand up, ***** off all your clothes and put them inside."

"All I need to do..."

"And then you go upstairs, get all the rest of your clothes out of the bedroom and put them in too."


"Everything. Including your shoes and boots. Including your coats and jackets hanging up in the hall. Including your swim shorts in the closet. Including...."

"Yeah, yeah. I get the picture..."

"Just as you wrote, and signed, last week. Do you remember the phrase?"


"Here, let me just 'jog' you memory a little. Now, where did I.... Ah, here it is.."

That damned piece of paper is produced.

"Now let me see... blah.. blah.. Ah yes.. here it is... 'every item of clothing or covering I possess which covers an area larger than a watch strap'... There. I think that's quite clear, don't you?"


"Good. Oh, and that means hats too. Now hop to it. The removals guys will be here at noon."

"The what?"

"The removals people. After you've packed all your clothes into the boxes and bags, they're going to take them away and store them for me."

"Store them. Where?"

"You don't need to know that. You just need to know that they are not accessible to you for... let me see... where is it... Ah... 'A period of not less than 6 weeks as decided by..' etc...etc..."

"And you're sure about this?"



"Well?... What are you waiting for?"

"I was just wondering what the guys at work are going to make of this..........!"
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1 Response Dec 9, 2012

Would love to do one of these with you, sounds very... adventures