Caring For a 21 Yr.old Parapelegic W/attitude

My son was paralized in a car accident last Oct.  He was in a coma for 2 months.  He has survived, however is now a parapelic and has an awful attitude about it.  While I can understand that he feels his life is over - there is so much more for him to do, as I feel God has intended.  God doesn't make mistakes so my son must grasp this opportunity, but he has such a bad attitude, hates life, hates me, feels he got cheated.  He is selfish and arrogrant, and has developed an attitude I have never seen before.  He is defiant and foul mouthed.  He is developing bedsores as he refuses any PT treatments, and he will surly die within the year as he is diabetic and obease.    Advice?

StavonsMom StavonsMom
56-60, F
2 Responses Mar 20, 2009

I am sure he does feel like dying. Losing the use of his limbs "in his eyes" is who he was. I am pretty sure I would be very angry too. He needs time to calm down and realize that although he has lost use of his limbs "those" did not make up WHO he is. He still has a brain and a mouth to voice himself. You did not state his age but if school age why not tell other kids how his accident happened and warn them what not to do. If the accident was caused by a drunk driver MADD would probably love to have him as a speaker. Everything happens for a reason, good, bad or indifferent. Maybe if he could see himself doing good by speaking about the accident it would help him and help the ones he talks to. But first he probably needs an outlet for the anger, counseling maybe? Or maybe just a good friend that can "take the punches".<br />
Mother to Mother I can not even begin to imagine what you are going through watching your son go through this pain. But right now I would guess that he needs every bit of hope and energy that you have to help him through this. God Bless you both!

tell him it could be a lot worse he could be in a home and they really don't care if you make it or not,,,and them bed sores,,,they are very painfull and hard to heal if you are unwilling to keep the presure off of them,,,stop being so ugly,,,and be gratfull that your mom is willing to sacurfise your own self for you,,,,<br />
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you want to be mad ,,,well be mad at your own self,,,,I wish I was there I would help both of you thou this trobling time,,,stop being mad,,,,please love with all that you have left in your self,,,this is a test on your destany son,,,be loving with all that you have left inside of you,,,because you won't have that long to be that way God,Goddess, is coming for all that are of love,,,,loving you much mary