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Mister Right, Or Mister Right-Now?

I am 26, but it really doesn't matter how old you are, it comes to a simple choice: Do you want Mister Right, or Mister Right-Now?

I am afraid that many of us have wasted our time, money and emotions on Mister (or Miss) Right-Now.  You know who I am talking about.  The one who you know that you can't marry, but can't seem to say goodbye to either.  He or she may be way off the mark, or pretty close, but it doesn't really matter because you know that it will never happen.

The problem of sticking with the Right-Now is that it leaves you unavailable for Mister/Miss Right.  How are they to know that you are just killing time waiting for them to show up?  You look like you are happy with Mister/Miss Right-Now.  And even if they approach you, are you really emotionally available enough to say goodbye to Mister/Miss Right-Now?

This is my declaration and the reason that I am single right now.

Stay strong.  Don't fold under the hype.  There is someone out there who is worth waiting for.

PS: This doesn't necessarily mean that you need to wait to date someone until you are sure that they are "the one."  More like, don't waste your time with someone who you already know ISN'T the one.

PPS:  Please do not view this statement as an endorsement for divorce.

PhantomAccordion PhantomAccordion 26-30, F 13 Responses Feb 21, 2008

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I agree with you. I think I'm so jaded about men and relationships, that I rather be alone.

I'm 36 and if I've spent ridiculous amounts of time trying to meet someone worth it. I've failed so far. I'm not ugly, crazy, co-dependent or a loser. The problem is that nowadays, most men don't want commitments or serious relationships. All they want is casual stuff and they don't want to move a finger to go out of their way for any woman, unless she's drop dead gorgeous or looks like a model. This is a shallow world, indeed and very cruel.

For a long time, I hoped to find Mr. Right, but I only met a bunch of "Mr. Right Now" and yes, you already know they're not worth it and you know in your heart they're not who you're looking for, yet you stick to them 'cause well, you're lonely or you find them attractive in some sort of way. I've realized I'm better off being alone and I'm not looking for anyone anymore. I guess that if it's meant to be for anyone to find true love, then it'll just happen when we least expect it.

So true! It made me feel so much better about my decision! One year on miss right-now but after reading this it all makes sense!

I appreciate this

Oh my gosh you hit the nail on the head with this one I have been preaching this for so long.Yet I myself had been in the same prediction.for Me i felt it would get better truth is it takes to and I let it go because I felt this very same way

My boyfriends and I just broke up. I think I've known for a long time that we were both just together because we didn't want to be alone. Reading this just helps so thank you.

How refreshing and inspiring!!

This is a great post; it reaffirms my decision to wait for the right man for me instead of settling.

when i had my first boyfriend, my dad told me not to get too serious because i was still young then and if i get married young, i might really regret it because there are so many good guys out there. <br />
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but back then, i was foolishly infatuated and was so excited to be in a relationship. i had a baby not long after and had to be married. now it wasn`t long before i realized that he wasn`t the right one. we stayed only for less than 2 years together.<br />
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now i`m alone and this time, i`m determined to wait. i know he will be worth it ;)

Great story and comments. I think it would be terrible to be with the wrong person when the right one came along. So much heartache...

I'm single for the same reasons. I think this is a fantastic message to encourage people to think about what, or who they truly deserve.

I agree you can't settle. I settled and now i am a married miserable person. don't do it if you know they are not the one. they won't magically change into the one. tigers don't change thier stripes unless they are painted on.

I met someone when I was alone. She was generous, sexy, and insanely jealous. As much as i liked the positive aspects of the relationship, I disliked the lack of trust and control issues.<br />
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At that point, she was Ms. Right Now. When I realized she was always going to be an emotional carnival ride of distrust and jealousy, I had to move on.<br />
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If I had my choice now, I prefer my pet kitten to her.

Well put! There is most certainly something to be said for knowing what you want and not settling for something 'right-now'.