Post

I Chose The Wrong Girl... Does That Make Me Wrong Too

"i love you with all my heart, please dont ever leave me.... i cant live without you" she once said.

today she says " why do you care so much.. why do love so much"
"i dont want to be with you.. leave me alone."

from "dont ever leave me" to "please leave me"!!
years of selfless love n this is what i get.
after 3 years of relationship now she says she does not want to be with me!

all the promises that she made "to be together, FOREVER" turned out to be fake.. she never meant any of it.
but i gave her all my trust n believed every single word.. only to find out one day, that she had never meant anything of whatever she said.

she says she was never that committed n casually apologizes for leading me into the relationship...
but the apology wont give me back the years i have lost... it wont mend my broken heart that cant trust anyone now.. it wont give me back all those years of my life i spent loving a girl who never loved me...

she cant understand true love, its her loss.
she is wrong, i know... but it was me who chose that wrong girl.. i chose to be in such a useless relationship and let her do all this to me.
today i have thrown her out of my life.. n surprisingly m not sad.. i dont have any regrets either.. infact i am happy with it.
i do have anger for what she did, n i will make her pay for that one day... but for now, i m happier alone, than being with that selfish b***h.

but the question still remains.. who is more wrong?
that selfish girl for playing with my feelings for years; or me for choosing the wrong girl n letting her play with my emotions...
TheLoneWalker TheLoneWalker 22-25, M 7 Responses Mar 23, 2012

Your Response

Cancel

Oh well maybe she is a crazy deranged psychopath. You know those poor pitiful souls. They are bound for eternity to suffer as a result of their self destroying ways. So, at least YOU are free now, and have the opportunity to have an amazing beautiful life. She will not be. Her self destructing choices sabbotage herself in the end as well. She will always be alone in the end. Everyone will eventually move out of her life. Abandonment will forever follow her. So be glad and thankful that you do not have to suffer til your last breath. She is never satisfied, bored, and missing what everyone has (feelings, love, emotions of life) that she can't. She is secretly an outcast forever struggling to pretend to be "one of us". A life like that sounds like the worst punishment imaginable. So, just remember when, or even IF you feel a bit down, that the universe truly Does have it's own way of dealing with karma accordingly. And to answer your question "who is more wrong?", well you didn't really state that you did anything wrong, just loved her, and trusted her. You went into great detail about what she did to you. So, are you simply looking for confirmation from ppl on EP? Only the two of you guys know the whole story, all the ins and outs, so perhaps the answer can only be answered knowledgeably by you both. And if that's the case, and she has no sense of right or wrong, then she will always blame you. ... So my point, to wrap it up, is that you know the answer. Doesn't matter is she understands it or not. Apparently her brain is trapped in childhood still. So, she won't be able to make sense of reality anyways. What a horrible way to live. .. Well hope this has cheered you up and lifted your spirits. I hope you find that women you truly deserve! I'm sure she is out there, waiting to meet you.

Lol! Amen to that.
Love the intensity my friend.
Its been months since I got over her. I don't care what happens to her anymore. I have moved on and made a mark in my life. It actually turned out to be positive for me!

i m very sorry for it but in other words it is good for you ......i m also in a relationship......how can she break any1's heart........but you don't think about past...you think for your new life which is going on .........you will get the best girl .....i tell you who will understand you.............................

thanks :)
well, i dont know y she changed, bt she did... n she aint d same person now.. she aint d girl i loved, daz y i dont miss her much.
n i dont want anyone anymore...
n love! daz out of question... right now, m focusing on the things which really matter to me.. n this pain fuels me to work even harder n achieve higher and higher.

It's not your fault. People grow apart sometimes. She is right, you now know more about what you want in a (_ or mate. Focus on grooving for the loss. A older friend once told Me that it's healthy to greive over the loss of the GF or bf because if you don't it could possibly harm future relationships. It's a form of letting go of the pain, heartache, and despair of the relationship. If we don't greive and think and let go we can carry that baggage into our next relationship Treat it as u would a friend dieing. Best advice I ever got. Talk more with next one and listen. I wish you well and hope this helped you.

Neither of you is wrong. I don't know about her but YOU, dearheart, have just learned a valuable lesson the hard way. When two people get caught up in the emotion and passion of a relationship there is always drama. Sometimes it is a good thing - makes it exciting. What you failed to anticipate is that we are all human and that feelings change, and sometimes for no apparent reason. <br />
As a woman who is old enough to be your mother and having strong maternal insincts you have my sympathy. I suggest that you let yourself grieve first. Mourn your loss. There will be other opportunities for you when you are ready.<br />
Next time approach it with a different attitude. Since no one knows what the future holds, live your next relationship in the present, one day at a time, sometimes one moment at a time. Focus on enjoying the time you have together and making the most of it . Then when it ends - as it inevitably will whether in a breakup or by death at age 95 - you will have no regrets and wonderful memories .<br />
Think about it. sweetie.

the most wonderful piece of advice! thanks a ton... u hv no idea how deeply ur words hv affected me.. i am very grateful 2 everyone here on EP, esp. u 'cairinkimberley'.. u people are just awesome.. i feel so much better now :)

bt still i cnt 4give her... she shud hv never committed things she cant deliver... being unable keep ur promise is one thing, bt making a promise n nt makin any efforts at all to fulfill it is a different issue... i had faith in her n believed her commitment 2 b true, so i too got serious in relatnship... bt if she was never serious she shudnt have made all dose promises in the first place.

You don't forgive to let someone else off the hook for their bad behaviour - you forgive to release yourself from dwelling on it - It takes time to heal allow yourself that luxury .

Neither of you are wrong...love is a fragile thing..and needs to supported and nurtured.. In addition, you may have simply been way more in love with her than she was with you...You found your life partner... and ...sadly...she did not..actually..because of your age..you are fortunate that she was honest, and simply said the truth, and is allowing you both to move on.<br />
<br />
You have lost nothing by having loved her..you have gained..because you had the opportunity to love with your whole heart..and you now know what you want the next time around..and so you are wiser..and more aware of life...and that is a very good thing.......you are wealthier having shared love...knowing love.....and so you have gained through this...not lost....

Know you are better without her and the best revenge is to love again and show her what she has missed out on.. <br />
<br />
I don't want to sound like a old auntie but your young and have lots of fun..explore and be happy.

She is definitely in the wrong if she was purposely leading you on. She may have truly cared for you, but stopped. I don't know why or how it happens, but it does. I'm sorry you had to go through that, but things will get better. You'll find someone new. Just take it slowly and don't worry about it too much. :)

thanks..
i too wish i cud understand y it happens.. bt i jz dnt wana think abt it nymore...
d thought that i wasted so many imp years of lyf on such a girl, still keeps runnin thru my head al d tym..
i can 4get her.. bt i cn nvr 4get wat she did 2 me.. afer all dose promises she made.
i nvr did nything in my life to deserve this... n d worst part is dat all this pain is given by d same person who used 2 say " i cant c u in pain... i wanna c u smiling always"
so many lies!!
it just fills me wid anger n hate; both 4 her n myself.