Dear Mia...

I used to think i was better than you. I used to think you were just a weak part of me that I could turn on and off at will, that I could use while I needed to get skinny and then stop using forever. But you were so clever. Your ideas were so seductive. You made me think that the solution to everything was eating, and that I could keep doing that and still control my weight. You were stronger than me. You made me hate myself and made me feel as if i am worthless, and that not absorbing food was the only way for me to feel better. I was weak. I let myself be pulled in.

But that all changes now. Because although you were stronger than me, that was only because I was so weak. My goal from now, is to be stronger than you. So then I can control YOU.
And I'm gonna start fighting now, and I'm gonna fake it till I make it.

Liptongal Liptongal
18-21, F
May 7, 2012