Growing up among the opposite sex I've always questioned whether or not their is a soul mate for everyone. I mean could there be a perfect match for me or you somewhere in this world. I wonder the concept is so mysterious but I guess the real question here is how far would you willing to go to find that special someone? you even care?. Truthfully I believe money can buy happiness & often people choose their pet as their ultimate companion or their career but I guess if it works then what's the big problem whatever helps you sleep at nigh right? I wouldn't mind being independent for as long as I can just to enjoy the single life & finding myself. Everyone has different goals & it's not like on your journey somewhere along the line you won't stumble upon love, whenever wherever it's bound to happen, letting it in is where it gets complicated timing for example is not just right. But when you think about it the reality is after a long day especially after one that has been stressful there's nothing like coming home to a person who desires to shower all their love & affection towards you..... a glass of wine does the trick I can hear someone say or a one night stand to blow off the steam or a friends with benefits to fill the void. I can't comprehend how we could say a person is a drug , drives them crazy or makes it impossible for them to breathe. That list could go on & on so I suppose while I wrote this I realized that this is a reason I fear to fall in love. I don't trust myself or the idea of becoming consumed by someone, the fact is though you can never be prepared when such a feeling takes over I just don't want to open my heart up & end up wasting what I can offer only to a person who in the end is going to not be their forever. Seeing their true colours, company & what qualities they possess that are enough for me to settle contently. The beauty of friendship especially if you've known one another since birth & suddenly one day you see them in a whole in a new light,  you have nothing to loose with someone you have such a connection right? or do you? it's risky but see the benefit is you've seen their flaws & habits so as long as you've known them see if you can fully accept them, a thought so far as marriage is frustrating because you will see them everyday for a majority of your life together. In society , for the younger generation who go around throwing "i love you" like it is a popular slang word in their personal dictionary the concept itself is complex. I think people my age are just in love with the idea doing things that a REAL couple in love would do or their of it & act like they are convincing themselves that they have have found what so many struggle to achieve. Understandable if they don't receive it at home but if they get taken advantage that's dangerous. I believe we all deserve at least a taste of it, to be unconditionally devoted with one guy for my entire life if I could meet & be with just that one I would do it spare me the heartaches. I myself have had my share of disappointment from the the guys I've come into contact with & have never been in a relationship, only interested to understand the way they operate & gain experience. Most recently the one I was strongly attracted to & potentially saw  a relationship with vanished but he being 19 it made sense besides he did have an on & off gf. Anyhow the sadness is something I never want to face again it was like a a total let down, but it's unavoidable I stand to rather be the dumper opposed to the dumpee but fair share I'll come to face. Still young I have made the firm decision to focus on the things that truly matter. Of course it would be everlasting if there was one guy that would fulfill my every need & beyond makes me breakfast or have chivalry like one of those 80's fella's but movies put huge pressure on the male gender entirely so lets leave that to fantasy.

My conclusion.... don't loose hope, don't lower your standards but don't be overpowering either & don't regret those you once loved cause they teach you a lesson. Maybe not ever you think, 5-10-20 yrs from now, to wait can drive a person mad but to focus on yourself & love who you are as a person is most important before letting someone else in. When we're young we engage in reckless love but as we age it gets more serious & worrisome with this uncertain emotion of misery & bliss. But life is not meant to be easy, you can strive through multiple relationships till you'll find who you've been looking for or wait till it hits you. But perhaps the biggest conflict is between your head & your heart, be careful not to be in love with the illusion of love....
livelymind livelymind
18-21, F
5 Responses Aug 14, 2010

I do believe in soul-mates, but i can't say whether there is one and only one soul-mate for you on this planet, for that i have a different theory.<br />
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Soul-mates means you two becomes one soul, although its just a concept because when you two are alive with two different bodies, you can't be joined in any way to make you one soul. But it means connected with your partner with not just social or physical bonding but with your heart(soul). Its about the such closeness of hearts between two that you can feel what they are thinking, feeling, wanting, etc.<br />
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There are two thing, the first is the chemistry/frequency/compatibility, it doesn't mean the common things/characteristics between you two, some differences may also contribute in making you two complete(made for each other).<br />
According to me two people can have a certain % of their matching in relation to best life partners, that you may try to calculate through horoscope, DNA compatibility, any other medical(brain frequencies, hormones, etc.) ba<x>sed, or any other spiritual way. Although its very difficult to find a 100% matching easily, i believe if you have found a certain level of matching say 70-80%, you can go along with them and the rest, the second thing will take care of. As it will also be foolish to search the whole population of planet for the best match or wait for god to send your mr/miss right directly on your date.<br />
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The second thing is true(& unconditional) love for "each other", this is very important in every relationship, lesser the matching, more the love is required to fill that gap. When you start loving someone unconditionally, you starts to like their every thing, even you ignores(or become blind to) the differences or their bad characteristics. The unconditional love should be from "both".<br />
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According to me, for any successful partnership(be it business or life), there can be two things working behind that, either they makes each other complete or there is an unconditional love between them. For example a business partnership can work between two persons without having any unconditional love among them, if they makes each other complete, like one knows the marketing best and the other production, but none can handle others department. if some day any one becomes able to manage others work, the partnership will no longer continue.<br />
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The people who say they have found their soul mate in each other have definitely made their matching % to 100 with the help of their unconditional love for each other. <br />
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So, the desire in both to love unconditionally is necessary to find your soul-mates, and also to run any partnership.<br />
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Best Wishes

after writing this all, i am thinking to re-post this as a separate story, with your permition madam, as this was originally written to answer your story.

Best Wishes

Thanks for your time.

No i don't mind be my guest, well ty for having the decency to ask, of course you too :)

On one end there can be none, not even ones self and on the other we can find as many. All depends on how we poise our soul. First we need to alLove love to enter. Once we entertain, we can then see which soul settles.

With proper spacing, your article could have been better to read.

Inviting you to read my stories for some inputs about soul mates.

Well thankyou for the personal insight you shared, fascinating to see from another's point of view. Also for the recommendation i appreciate , always had issues with writing though determined to improve that over time &amp; thanks i'll give it a look sometime for sure!

nothing is difficult, once you are determined. do you like writing?

That definately steers me in the right direction, yes i do short stories alot

@ clainetwin <br />
Well that's something i never heard before but makes me feel better. See that's what i was saying , it's another possibility to just find urself in that perfect moment. Lol that's funny but i can't see why not , again another sign of just time. Beautifully said , woah 40! make sure to tell my mom she seems to be loosing interest/hope in ever doing so. Reminds me of when i was younger , the boy who would tease me and mistreat me but deep down i knew he was interested. Oh definately , had my fair share --> My Sister Went Missing story i mean when i met him the first thing that i thought was criminal. Yea i find those are the desperate kind who try so hard to see past people's flaws blinding themselves from the person's true nature.

@stayley wise <br />
Sry i took so long to reply ! your welcome oh realli well i appreicate that. Yes i have given the past experiences i have had in the love department but unlike many teenagers my age i don't believe love exists in highschool i mean i myself don't really want to be tied down at such a young age. Same i could agree with that and yes i do for e.g friends that we're there all along but you never saw them in that light . That's one way to put but sometimes i believe it's just destiny , fate true i mean it's very rare to find one person who you love and will be with for the rest of your life but moving more then one well my only comment , debatable but i think it's possible to love one physically and one emotionally , wonder y some have affairs? ...<br />
Well it depends for me it's all a matter of time & holding onto to hope , you can have multiple relationships and keep going through losers, learn lessons to eventually finding the one or wait for a moment of the blue to spur and meet that special someone. That of course i don't what i'd do without my family , bth very wise line. Thankyou for your kindess and words of wisdom ;)

I found my soul mate doing everyday things. There was no looking involved and took me by surprise. You dont have to worry about finding or looking they seem to fall from the sky sometimes you may have known them for years and other times a short while. When the time comes for you and that person, you will find one another. It may be tomarrow, next year, or even when your 40. Just keep an open mind and remember not all are who they appear. Some may look like jerks and be sweethearts others the complete oppisite is true. If someone is interested give them a shot keep a look out for the creeps. If your instincts say dont trust them listen and most the time they wont lead you wrong (mine havent). Some dont listen to their instincts often enough and then wish they did when things dont go so well.