One For The Road

Inside an old & tattered dirty bar
Misery slowly turning into desolation
Sits a dreamer, a could of been
Waiting for some much needed inspiration

"Fill me up" mumbles from the background
A miserable barman pours one for the aggravated drunk
Slides it along the sweat encrusted counter
Quenched it, downed it, replying with the same phrase

Stale stench of rough cigar smoke
Gradually smothering the "overture" of conversation
A vintage radio jutting out from the corner
Written on it "Purchases Through Tax Evasion"

Old rusty road signs cover the gloomy walls
A basin overloaded with discarded cigarettes
"One more for the Road" says the unwise drunk
Slowly decaying into his own ring of death.

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Daveokay Daveokay
22-25, M
2 Responses Jul 11, 2010

Link doesn't work, but I liked it, especially the atmosphere. The flow was a bit iff in the second stanza in my opinion and I would personally use a different word to describe the barman (having already used "miserable" in the first part), something like "wretched," but apart from that, nice work.

yeah i liked it