• "Don't y'all have purple?!  My girlfriend wants me to wear purple!"
  • "I can't afford this ****!"
  • "I want this one in black for my wife, and another one in red for my girlfriend."
  • "Do y'all have my size?"
  • "Quit following me around the store, *****!" (to the sales lady that follows people)
  • "I hit the cajun restaurant in the food court before coming in here, so, I wouldn't walk over there if I were you!"
  • "Where all my hoes at?!"
  • "Do y'all have dog lingere?!?"
  • "Ah, ****!  Nobody told me these things had ink in them!"
  • "Where's the dressing room?"
  • "I need to be fitted for a bra."
  • "Y'all should come out with NFL themed lingere!"
  • "Do y'all sell libido pills, my wife here needs them something terrible!"
  • "What?!?  The models don't actually work in the stores?!?"
  • "Oh great, now I'm pitching a tent!"
  • "Honey, pick that one and I'll give you the best five minutes of your life!"
  • (Wife emerges from the dressing room in her lingere)  "No, you still don't look like Heidi Klum to me."
  • "Do you think my grandma would like this?"
  • "That perfume smells like cat ****."
  • "Gimme the crotchless ones, easier access."
  • "Is this a hat?!?"
  • "Damn, I need to get some."
  • "Oops!  I just broke it, do I have to buy it?"


This list could go on forever.  I think it would be nice to also write a list of things men should never say in general and give each one of them the manual the day they are born!  LOL!

urbrandofheroin urbrandofheroin
22-25, F
3 Responses Feb 23, 2009

lol, all this smiling is making my face hurt. :-)

How about "Gee, it looked better on my ex for some reason?"<br />
<br />
or<br />
<br />
"My ex had one just like it."<br />
<br />
"If you were built more like _______________, you'd have more to choose from."<br />
<br />
"Yeah sure, it makes you look good."<br />
<br />
"Why don't ask the salesgirl what she wears."<br />
<br />
"Do you have anything that'll lift, separate, and make em look younger?"

OMG! I had been thinking of a few, but you covered them and more Urbrandofheroin. I just laughed out loud at the ones I hadn't though of, specifically "Oh great, now I'm pitching a tent" and "That perfume smells like cat ****". LOL, thanks for the laughs!!