A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.
“If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, ... just intense negotiations, pretty much every 28 days.”
Fleas, Samuel... Fleas. How COULD you? Lol! forever a classic!
A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As
she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his
stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest...
According to my three children, I'm antique! 😟
I was in the living room with my kids... they were sitting down to watch TV, and I was logging into the computer.
A Girl's First Time
As you lie back your muscles tighten. You put him off for a while searching for an excuse, but he refuses to be swayed as he approaches you.
He asks if you're...
Please help me find the right caption :)) lmfao
What were they thinking??
Biscuits & Doughnuts!
An admiral visits one of the ships under his command. While eating breakfast with the crew he was impressed to see the naval insignia stamped on every biscuit...
The Birds and The Bees
A teacher was giving her six-year-olds class their first lesson about the birds and the bees.
"When you grow up, you will get married and after about a...
Trying a New Drink
A man goes into a bar very thirsty. He sits down waiting for the bartender to see him.
The man next to him calls for the bartender saying, "I'll have another...
Q: What did the Cat say after eating two robins lying in the sun?
A: I just love baskin' robbins.
“I got a compliment on my driving today,” said a blonde to her friend, there was a note left on my windshield it said “parking fine”.
I think it's my one saving grace! People can fault me for the way I look or the things I've done. But something they can't fault me on is my sense of humour.
Very dry with a little...
A redhead tells her blonde stepsister, "I slept with a Brazilian...." The blonde replies, "Oh my God! You sl**! How many is a Brazilian?"