Two little boys are starting kindergarten. The first Littleboy says my dad is a Carpenter. The second little boy says my dad is a lawyer.
The first little boy says honest? The...
"If there's a chicken pox, is there a frog pox?"
- asked by six-year old Blueberry
My dog rolled over and then she licked her nose hahaha
all I need is a box and some foam peanuts,
best day ever
I'm laughing because
Me and Jake were eating pizza. And Jake was kinda dancing to the noise in the background
The noise in the background is coming from the dishwasher...
Why God Created Eve
10. God was worried that Adam would frequently become lost in the Garden.
9. God knew that one day Adam would require someone to locate and hand him the...
Yesterday afternoon. I was walking and holding hands with my wife. I suddenly drop her hand and grabbed my cell phone to take this picture. She hit me in my chest and wouldn't talk...
An Experienced Doctor
A man goes into the doctor. He says, "Doc, you gotta check my leg. Something's wrong. Just put your ear up to my thigh, you'll hear it!"
What do you call a pile of cats?
Why couldn't the bicycle stand?
Because he was too tired!
What type of frozen drinks do policemen serve?
Joe said, "Know what, Charlie? I killed 5 flies yesterday, 3 males and 2 females." "How could you tell them apart, Joe? asked Charlie. "Joe replied, "It was easy. The 3 males were...
.“The woodcutter stretched every morning before starting work. He was a limberjack.”
I read in my.local newspaper that the toilet was stolen from our Police station.., if you can believe that!
The cops have nothing to go on!
Two nuns from Ireland come to tour New York City. Before they come, they hear that Americans eat dogs, so they both agree to try it when they arrive. As they're walking around New...
Riddle: I'm written with two letters, said with one and seen with two.
What am I?
Answer: Eye ('e' and 'y' are the only letters).
An older couple is lying in bed one morning, having just awakened from a good night's sleep. He takes her hand and she responds, "Don't touch me."
"Why not?" he asks.
so, my friend just asked me, "dude, do you know what's the difference between guys and girls?" and I said, "no." and he replied "pffft, it's easy guys are ****-ing and girls are...